I'll be twenty in a couple months Feels like my life ain't done enough Still waiting for my parents': We're proud of you Still searching for a moment that feels true And it hits me hard 'cause I made that promise I'm not the person I told you I'd be, mom Dad's still working every single night And I still can't handle this anxiety fight I'm still just a kid scared of the dark Scared of the quiet and my own heart But even more scared of the world outside And everything I'm trying so hard to hide But I'm tired of this shit I need a change Something's gotta shift Something has to break All of this pain has to get better someday Eleven XI feels like a sign on the way