She climbs a tree and scrapes her knee Her dress has got a tear She waltzes on her way to mass And whistles on the stair And underneath her wimple she has curlers in her hair I even heard her singing in the abbey She's always late for chappel but her penitence is real She's always late for everything except for every meal I hate to have to say it but I very firmly feel Maria's not an asset to the abbey I like to say a word in her behalf Maria makes me laugh How do you solve a problem like Maria How do you catch a cloud and pin it down How do you find a word that means Maria A flibbertijibbet, a will o-the wisp, a clown Many a thing you know you like to tell her Many a thing she ought to understand But how do you make her stay And listen to all you say How do you keep a wave upon the sand Oh how do you solve a problem like Maria How do you hold our moonbeam in your hand? When I'm with her I'm confused, out of focus and bermused And I never know exactly where I am Unpredictable as wheather She's as flighty as a feather She's a darling, she's a demon, she's a lamb She'd outpester any pest Drive a hornet from its nest She can throw a whirling dervish out of whirl She is gentle, she is wild She's a riddle, she's a child She's a headache, she's and angel She's a girl How do you solve a problem like Maria How do you hold our moonbeam in your hand? How do you find a word that means Maria A flibbertijibbet, a will o-the wisp, a clown Many a thing you know you like to tell her Many a thing she ought to understand But how do you make her stay And listen to all you say How do you keep a wave upon the sand Oh how do you solve a problem like Maria How do you hold our moonbeam in your hand?