I want candy Bubble gum and taffy Skip to the sweet shop with my sweetheart Sandy Got my pennies saved, so I'm her sugar daddy I'm her Hume Cronyn, she's my Jessica Tandy I want candy Put it in a pile Split it with my biddy Fifty-fifty, down the line Kinda like Close Encounters of the Cavity Kind I'm talking licorice kisses Talking chocodile smiles I want candy I got a sugar tooth Put on your shinguards, Sandy, 'cause I wanna knock boots Lick a peppermint stick till the lollipop droop Gumdrops, it don't stop, till it licked knocked loose (Candy, candy) I need candy Bubblegum and taffy Get in my way, punk, you're gonna get your ass beat, nasty Do it so your dad sees Embarrass your whole family Just 'cause you came between a kid and his candy I need candy Any kind'll do Don't care if it's nutritious or FDA approved It's gonna make me spaz like bobcats on booze A hyperactive juice That only I can produce That fuels a giant drill, bores straight into hell Releasing ancient demons from their sleep-forever spell So they can walk upon the earth, and get resituated And hawk the diet pills MC Pee Pants have created I need candy Want some candy Eat candy till I'm dead I'll kill you for some candy Give me candy, candyhead Where you keeping all the candy? Who made you Candy King? If you don't give me some candy I will make the ladies sing Candy, in the morning Candy on the way to school Candy, at school, at lunch, in the afternoon Candy, at school, on the way home from school Candy, at dinner, at dinner, in bed Mess up the mix, mix up the mess Come on down, yo, here's the address Said, 6-1-2 Wharf Avenue Right next to Gentleman's Club