The wisest man I ever knew had a cottage outside Loew His name was David Alexander Kidd It was David who predicted the world would end in 1960 And for David Alexander Kidd, it did He was around his grocer, Mr. Spicer, playing with his bacon slicer A lovely girl with great big knickers known as Sue When the blade cut off his hand, he picked it up And ran to see the famous surgeon Dr. Pew He said: Sew it back on again And he said: Of course, I can, my friend But first, of all, you need to pay me 2, 000 quid He said: But I cannot afford to pay And the doctor said: Good day, push off home As he did, but as he passed the water mill He glanced up the hill up to where Chapel of St. Levy used to stand And a little farther down, he saw Little Father Downe He was sitting with a surplus in his hand He was stitching up a tear And sewing with such care David said: Father, could you sew my hand back on? And he said: There is nothing in God's plan that is beyond the scope of man But first of all, you must have faith, my son So while Faith held his thumb David sat down, while his chum stitched back his hand, just like it was before It's a miracle! Dave cried The priest just smiled with humble pride (Humble pride?) And he saw him disappear across the moor When Dave got back to his feet Who would he chance to meet, but the wicked profiteering Dr. Pew Dave said: Look what faith has done for me Ah, and done it all for free So, Dr. Pew, you know what you can do