[Matthew] Some boys will bring your flowers Some will even serenade [Jessi] But you and me will while away the hours Just a-dishin' and a-throwin' shade [Jessi and Matthew] Forever side by side Through snark and snide I'm stuck to you like glue [Matthew] So, honey, who needs Who needs a boy when I got you? [Jessi] When life's loses and clowns start getting you down, I'll be there to share your cutting glare [Matthew] And when the stink of the world makes you just wanna hurl, you can count on me to hold your hair [Jessi and Matthew] Cause when it comes to hate, I've found the perfect mate and baby, you know what else will do So tell me who needs, who needs a boy when I got you And I never expect you to hold me tight And lock me in your loving gaze But I know I'll have a shoulder to cry on [Matthew] That is, if I were inclined to such pathetic displays [Jessi and Matthew] Guys may come and guys may go And we'll size 'em up in half a glance [Connie] Say, Maury, these kids got some chemistry [Maury] Nope, she'll never get into his pants Sorry [Jessi and Matthew] Maybe someday, we'll find true love And drift apart like friends will do [Matthew] But till then [Jessi] Who needs a boy [Matthew] Some moron that soon will annoy I ask ya [Jessi and Matthew] Who needs a boy When I got you?