Laurel was a girl I knew Made of dirt and stone Pretty hip in younger years But now she sits alone With a hundred thousand Architectural disasters that she calls homes And Beverly Glen was pretty All the rich boys loved her curves She tried to get the credit sometimes More than she deserved Like those cheesy 80's movies Epitomizing all things We'd come to know And Beachwood was a boheme From the sexy 60's scene Grew up east of West Hollywood And somewhere in between All the madness Laurel puts up with, but Somehow, always tolerates a scene And Nichols, you know, had a way With the performing arts A and R guys having cookouts On his back with superstars But he had some nasty habits and Some potholes to cover up this drama queen Sometimes Beachwood yelled at Laurel On the terms of selling out Then Laurel yelled at Beverly For not knowing what life's about With her trust fund, friends and family It felt just like an earthquake When she'd shout And Silverlake just stood there With her nose up in the air Pushing up her horn rimmed glasses, saying I don't fucking care! 'Bout the drama all you idiots are buying Selling, and leasing up there And San Fernando was a struggling actor Drove a deli truck On to the sets of porno movies He was just trying to make a buck While his pilot was an escrow He dreamed of dating Beverly one day