I don't wanna die I just don't wanna be alive, in black, in white 'Cause nothing matters when my mind is like cyanide Drowning me in dead butterflies Free from pain, numb's the price Drowning me in dead butterflies Comfort of a warm embrace, jokes that got me through the day Friends I couldn't live without mean nothing now, nothing now (nothing now) I love you's and you'll be okay's, affirmations that I craved Words that helped when I was down mean nothing now, nothing now (nothing now) Emotions paralyzed and pinned down tight They all forgot how to fly I don't wanna die I just don't wanna be alive, in black, in white 'Cause nothing matters when my mind is like cyanide Drowning me in dead butterflies Free from pain, numb's the price Drowning me in dead butterflies Deepest dreams I live to chase, passions that outweighed the pain Accolades that made me proud mean nothing now, nothing now (nothing now) Emotions paralyzed and pinned down tight Where dopamine goes to die I don't wanna die I just don't wanna be alive, in black, in white 'Cause nothing matters when my mind is like cyanide Drowning me in dead butterflies Free from pain, numb's the price Drowning me in dead butterflies (butterflies) When I try to feel, I fall Every ceiling is a wall What the hell are these wings for? When I try to feel, I fall Every ceiling is a wall What the hell are these wings for? The reasons I'd commit to stay, the optimist that kept me sane The faith I used to never doubt, mean nothing now I don't wanna die I just don't wanna be alive, in black, in white 'Cause nothing matters when my mind is like cyanide Drowning me in dead butterflies Free from pain, numb's the price Drowning me in dead butterflies