So you wanna be a hero kid, well whoop de doo I have been around the block before with blockheads just like you Each and everyone a disappointment, pain For which there's no ointment So much for excuses, done with kid of zeus's' Asking me to jump into the fray My answer is two words: Oh, kay You mean you'll do it? You win You won't be sorry phil! Oh gosh So when do we start? Can we start now? Oy, vey I've givin' hope that someone would come along A fella who would ring the bell for once, not the gong The kind who wins trophies, won't settle for lophies At least semi-prophecies, but noooooo I get the green horn I've been out to pasture pal, my ambition gone Content to spend lazy days to graze my lawn But you need an advisor, a sayter but wiser A good merchandiser and woooah! There goes my ulcer! I'm down to one last hope and I hope it's you Though kid, you're not exactly a dream come true I've trained enough turkey's who never came through You're my one last hope, so you'll have to do Rule number six: When rescuing a damsel Always handle with care! Rule number 95, kid: Concentrate! Rule number 96: Aim! Demigods have faced the odds and ended up a mockary Don't believe the stories that you read on all the crockery To be a true hero kid is a dying art Like paintin' a masterpiece: It's work of heart! It takes more than sinew It comes down to what's in you You'll have continue to grow, now that's more like it! I'm down to one last shot, and my best, I know Before that blasted underworld get's my goat My dreams are on you kid, go make them come true Keep on the soap, keep pushing the envelope, you're My one last hope and kid, it's up to you!