I remember fourteen No existential dread yet Only schoolboys to be scared of And trying not to be noticed Even though I was a loner The house was still a home And when you’re growing up sheltered Nothing changes but the weather Then along came all the numbness My mother noticed it 'Cause I wasn’t at the table But underneath my covers crying So she took me to the doctors They declared me with depression And when we talked about fixing me up They went straight to head medicine And the school set me up with the counsellor Social anxiety heightened Taken as a fool to my body And shameful of what the mirror sold me Then I opened up to my father He said he was just the same when he was seventeen And when I asked if someone knew that he was hurting He said boys didn’t talk about feelings No boys still don’t talk about feelings But nothing compares to nineteen It hit me with a fist full of a new feeling No nothing compares to nineteen It hit me with a fist full of a new feeling No nothing compares No nothing compares No nothing compares to nineteen I'd never lost someone, I'd never lost a friend And he was only twenty-one, silence the killer in the end Silence the killer