[Emmet] Whoa, Elle? What's up, Doc? [Elle] Love [Emmet] Excuse me? [Elle] I put my faith in love I followed where it led [Emmet] Love led you here? [Elle] To my personal circle of Hell It has not worked out well I wish that I were dead Cause instead of a wedding in love I'm flunking out of school A total laughing stock Someone he and his friends could just mock So go on, here's my head Just hit it with a rock! [Emmet] Wait, go back! You came out here to follow a man Harvard law was just part of that plan Man, what rich romantic planet are you from? [Elle] Malibu? [Emmet] Instead of lying outside by the pool You stalk some guy to an ivy league school? That's the weirdest reason I have- [Elle] Oh, why'd you come? [Emmet] Okay I grew up in the Roxbury slums With my mom and a series of bums Guys who showed me all the ways a man can fail I got through law school by busting my ass Worked two jobs in addition to class So forgive me for not weeping at your tale [Elle] Well excuse me Just because you've got some kind of chip on your shoulder [Emmet] You know what? You're right There's a chip on my shoulder And it's big as a boulder With the chance I've been given I'm gonna be driven as hell I'm so close I can taste it So I'm not gonna waste it Yeah, there's a chip on my shoulder You might wanna get one as well [Elle] I'm sorry, but that sounds highly negative. Wait! Two jobs plus law school?! How do you do it? [Emmet] Well, I don't go to parties a lot Not good use of the time that I've got Can't spend hours doing my hair and staying in shape [Elle] I don't spend hours! [Emmet] But I know it'll all be worthwhile When I win my first lucrative trial And buy my mom that great big house out on the Cape! [Elle] Oh, that's so sweet! [Emmet] No, that's the chip on my shoulder I hugged my mom and told her With the chance I've been given I'm gonna be driven as hell Though I can't take the day off I just think of the payoff You need a chip on your shoulder Little Miss Woods comma Elle [Elle] I just need to prove to everyone that I'm serious! [Emmet] What you need is to get to work! Where are your law books? [Elle] Umm, well, I know they're here somewhere [Emmet] You know, this vanity's real picturesque But it started its life as a desk Clear it off, and find some room for books instead [Elle] What are you doing?! [Emmet] Can you live without this? Can you live without that? I don't know what this is [Elle] It's for hair! [Emmet] Wear a hat! Spend some time improving what's inside your head! Out, out, put it in storage, sell it on eBay, leave it behind Out, out, what, are you angry? Good, so get angry! You may find The chip on your shoulder [Elle] Argh! [Emmet] The room just got colder [Elle] Hey! [Emmet] But with the chance you've been given Why are you not driven as hell?! There's just no way around it You gotta plow through til you've [Elle] Found it! [Emmet] Been reading it hard, I can tell [Delta Nu girls] Tis a gift to be simple Tis a gift to be free Hmm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm-mm [Elle] Bye, Warner! Have a great Thanksgiving! Say hi to your mom and dad for me! And Grandma Bootsie [Emmet] Define malum prohibitum [Elle] Malum prohibitum is, umm [Emmet] An act prohibited-- [Elle] An act prohibited by law like jaywalking or chewing gum in Singapore [Emmet] Therefore malum ensae? [Elle] Is an action That is evil in itself Assualt, murder, white shoes after labor day [Emmet] Good Where are you going? [Elle] Home, of course! It's Thanksgiving break, remember? [Emmet] Interesting [Elle] What? [Emmet] Well, I predict you will probably pass [Elle] Yes! [Emmet] In the bottom percent of your class [Elle] What? [Emmet] If you're going for mediocre, you've done great! [Elle] That's not fair! [Emmet] Look, they laughed at me like they're laughing at you We can't win if we don't follow through! Might I venture your vacation plans can wait? [Elle] Why do you always have to be right? [Delta Nu girls] Glo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-ria! In excelsis deo [Elle] Bye, Warner! Merry Christmas! Enjoy Bayo! [Emmet] Ho-ho-ho! [Elle] Emmett! [Emmet] For you! Not as good as going home for Christmas, but [Elle] You are too sweet [Emmet] It's a real time saver Shampoo and conditioner in one! [Elle] Ah! (Giggles) Thank you You are so adorable to think of me [Warner] Elle, hey! [Elle] Warner! [Warner] Have you seen Vivian? I've been looking for her everywhere! [Elle] Yeah I-I mean no [Warner] Great! We're gonna miss our flight! [Emmet] Um, Elle? I don't know if you've noticed before But each time Warner walks through the door Your IQ goes down to 40 Maybe less [Elle] Huh? [Emmet] Though it's hardly my business to say Could it be the real thing in your way Is the very guy you're trying to impress [Elle] Yes! I've been smiling and sweeten' thoroughly beaten blowing my chance Let's not chase him away Let's face him and say Hey punk, let's dance! This chip on my shoulder Makes me smarter and bolder No more whining or blaming I am reclaiming my pride Grab that book and let's do this Instead of doodling hearts all through this Now there's a chip on my shoulder! Let's see him knock it aside! [Delta Nu girls] Ah-ah-ah-ah Daughter of Delta Nu Show him that you're no fool Daughter of Delta Nu Go back to school with a big chip on your shoulder! [Warner] Mr. Ladimer was clearly within his rights to ask for visitation Without his sperm, the child in question wouldn't exist! [Callahan] Now you're thinking like a lawyer! Yes, Miss Woods [Elle] Mr. Huntington makes an excellent point But did the defendant keep a log of every sperm emission made throughout his life? [Callahan] Interesting Why do you ask? [Elle] Well, unless the defendant attempted to contact every sexual encounter To find out if a child resulted from those unions He has no parental claim over this child whatsoever Why now? Why this sperm? [Callahan] I see your point [Elle] And by Mr. Huntington's standards All masturbatory emissions where the sperm was clearly not seeking an egg Could be called reckless abandonment [Callahan] Miss Woods, you just won your case [Elle] Ohmigod [Delta Nu girls] Wait, hold on, we just won the case! [Elle] Omigod [Delta Nu girls] Elle got all up in Warner's face [Elle] Omigod [Delta Nu girls] I am starting to like this place! Yes! Omigod! [Callahan] Miss Woods, excellent work today I assume you're applying for my internship Do you have a resume? [Elle] I am one step ahead of you Here you go, and thanks in advance for your consideration [Callahan] Dear God, it's scented Three months ago, I would have recycled this Make sure to put it on file [Emmet] Guess she got a chip on her shoulder Maybe some wise man told her With the chance we've been given We gotta be driven as hell She was something to see there I'm just happy I could be there First big test and she aced it She's so close she can taste it She got a chip on her shoulder Guess you never can te-e-ell With little Miss Woods comma Elle! [Delta Nu girls] Elle Woods Woods comma Elle Chip on her shoulder Elle Woods Woods comma Elle Chip on her shoulder [Emmet] No you never can tell [Delta Nu girls] Elle Woods Woods comma Elle Chip on her shoulder [All] With little Miss Woods comma Elle