A single slice Or even two, Bruce Might have been nice But even you, Bruce Have to admit Between you and it There's not a lot of difference in size He can't, he can! He surely can't! He surely can't! You are the man, Bruce! He might explode! He's quite elastic He’s going to blow! Make him stop! He’s fantastic, look at him go! I can’t watch! I think in effect This must confirm, Bruce What we all suspected You have a worm, Bruce Or maybe a largeness Is a bit like the Tardis Considerably roomier inside He can't! He can! He surely can't! He surely can't! You are the man, Bruce! B-R-O-O-C-E Bruce! You'll never again be subject to abuse For your immense caboose She'll call a truce, Bruce With every swallow you are tightening the noose We never thought it was possible But here it is coming true We can have our cake and eat it too The time has come To put that tumbly tum to use No excuse, Bruce Let out your belt I think you'll want your trousers loose Ooooh, stuff it in! (Bruce!) You've almost finished (Bruce!) You'll fit it in Whatever you do just don't give in (Bruce!) Don't let her win! Come on, Bruce, be our hero Cover yourself in chocolate glory Bruce! You'll never again be subject to abuse For your immense caboose She'll call a truce, Bruce Just one more bite and you'll have completely cooked 'er goose We never thought it was possible But here it is coming true We can have our cake and eat it Go on, Brucie!