[Luke] Come on, grab some ambrosia And let the nectar flow [Percy] Why is everyone scraping part Of their plate into the fire? Is the food here really that bad? [Luke] Offering to the gods It's not enough that they're omnipotent And all-powerful, they need to feel appreciated To the gods! [Ensemble] To the gods! [Luke] Oh, things couldn't be worse When your parents run the universe [All] Oh, things couldn't be worse When your folks run the universe [Luke] My dad is hermes He messengers things You'll know his sign by his shoes with those wings I'd wait by the phone, but the phone never rings Oh, no When your dad's a God, life can be tough I met the guy once, and once was enough Annabeth? [Annabeth] My mom's athena She's smart and she's wise She's sworn off gluten and she's sworn off guys But if she came to camp, it'd be a surprise Oh, no [Luke and Katie] Oh no Oh, and my stepmom, she hates me And my dad works all day So I left Virginia and I ran away [Percy] Wait, is that true? [Luke] Everybody! [All] Oh, things couldn't be worse When your parents run the universe Oh, things couldn't be worse When your folks run the universe [Luke] Alright, who's next? [Katie] Oh! Okay, let me see My mom's demeter Goddess of grain She gets excited when it starts to rain But planting and planting and planting's a pain Oh, no [Ensemble] Oh, no Right? For their sixteenth birthday, my friends got a car I got a fern in some dumb mason jar [Grover] Ooh, ooh! My turn! I'm a child of pan God of the wild For those who love nature, they're often beguiled He's not really my dad, but I'm sort of his child Oh, no [Ensemble] Oh, no He went for a hike to explore new frontiers And no one has seen him for thousands of years [All] Oh, things couldn't be worse When your parents run the universe Oh, things couldn't be worse When your folks run the universe [Percy] Chiron! Who's your dad? [Chiron] Oh, well My father is Kronos Remember my lecture He ate his children [Luke] Chiron wins How about you, Silena? [Silena] The goddess of love My mom's aphrodite She tries to be cool but mainly she's flighty I'll bring home a boy, and she's there in her nightie [Ensemble] Oh, no! It's so embarrassing, guys! I tried to seek help from even the fates Cause she steals my mascara and all of my dates [Luke] Alright, Percy, it's your turn [Percy] If I tried to sing, it'll probably cause an avalanche [Luke] Oh, we're all friends here Come on, give it a shot [Percy] My mom was named sally She loved scary movies And food that was blue And- [Katie] He's doing it wrong [Silena] Yeah, who's your godly parent? [Percy] Oh I don't know [Luke] It's alright a lot of half-bloods Never know their godly parent Just give it a try [Percy] So my dad is some God That's great I guess Did he not want me? Or not want the stress? Too bad he's the worst, and my life is a mess Oh, no I hope he shows even a trace Cause I got some choice words to throw in his face! [All] Oh, things couldn't be worse When your parents run the universe Oh, things couldn't be worse [Will] But I don't care where our parents may be As long as you are here with me [All] We don't care where our parents may be As long as you are here with me As long as you are here with me!