Hey, have you heard the latest from Big Bird? It sounds ridiculous, get a load of this He says he has a friend only known to him He calls him Aloysius Snuffleupagus Apparently when no one's watching Is when the two get to talking He says he's big and hairy, but not the least bit scary With great big lazy eyes, he swaggers side to side And has a longish nose, and walks a little slowly A peculiar invention, even for Mr. Henson Which makes me think, though I hate to say it That the creature is fabricated No, I don't believe he really does exist Because I've never seen this Snuffleupagus It's all in the big bird's brain And besides, what kind of name is Snuffleupagus? I talked to Bert and Ernie, Cookie Monster's worried Kermit the Frog agrees "it's just a tragedy" Someone should check that bird, take his temperature Maybe he took a fall, or drugs or alcohol Or maybe Big Bird has some problems Well, if he does, hey, we all got 'em But that does not mean that we all should get Our own imaginary, hairy psychologist No, I don't believe he really does exist Because I've never seen this Snuffleupagus It's all in the big bird's brain And besides, what kind of name is Snuffleupagus? I mean no ill intentions, but perhaps an intervention Is what our bird friend needs to restore his sanity So you round up the crew and I'll go see how he's doing Here he comes as a matter of fact Hey, did you see THAT? No, I don't believe he really does exist Because I don't think I've seen this Snuffleupagus But hey, I'm open-minded Let's say I'm undecided