If you want to eat some dog I have good news There's an annual dog festival Where you can eat all the dog you want And it's located in Yulin Guangxi China And the festival spans about ten days With fifteen thousand dogs consumed And it goes from the twenty first to the 30th of June I just wanna let you know I'm just tryna be a bro So you first take a flight to Guangzhou China Once you get off at that airport You wanna ask around for the Guangxi provincial bus And it costs twenty US dollars And it's a four and a half hour ride And you get off at Maoming West Just remember Maoming West Now you might have to stay there a full night Depending on the time you arrive Because the next bus that goes to Yulin only runs like once a day And you have to buy another ticket It's about another tenty two bucks But from there it goes straight to Yulin Soon enough you'll be eating some dog Now there are about eight available hotels in Yulin I'm checking online now I suggest the Yulin Lijing International Hotel Offering a sauna, fitness center Wow, it's not too bad at all Nevermind, it's fifty bucks a night But with free complementary breakfast And a free cancelation fee So it's not as bad as I thought When you're ready the concierge Will know exactly which festival you're talking about And he or she will give you directions So take a cab But don't get ripped off If you're white they'll charge you double I shit you not I shit you not But anyways, enjoy your flight Goodbye Enjoy the dog festival