I used to be the loneliest guy in town, couldn't find a girl Till one day I took my troubles down to madam broom You know that gypsy with a goat-cap too She's got a pad down on thirty-fourth and five Selling little bottles of love potion number nine I told her that I was a flop with chicks It's been that way since nineteen fifty six She jumped down, turned around and made a magic sign And handed me a bottle of love potion number nine She jumped down, turned around and gave me a wink She said: I'm gonna mix it up right here in the sink It smelled like turpentine and looked like india ink I held my nose and closed my eyes, I took a drink I didn't know if it was day or night I started kissing everything in sight But when I kissed a cop down on thirty-fourth and five It broke my little bottle of love potion number nine Here you are son, don't be afraid Just drink this, drink it all now So I closed my eyes, I held my nose, I took a drink I didn't know if it was day or night I started kissing everything in sight But when I kissed a cop on thirty-fourth and five It broke my little bottle of love potion number nine Love potion number nine Love potion number nine