They were standing there together like a statue by Monet I knew that it was over by the way she had her say Her pockets held her glasses, her glasses held her staes I knew that it was over by the way she combed her hair For all my troubles, I never got to meet the mom There never was a time when she'd given me a break Even on our first date she hadda make me wait With her questions out of nowhere and my answers 'bout the same By the time I got her to the door I didn't know my name For all my troubles, I never got to meet the mom (no never, never, no never, never) Never got to meet the mom Never to shake her palm Never got to be in love Or kiss her 'neath the stars above Though her daughter was quite cute With her hips and her father's loot I like 'em older than the rest I like 'em when they've passed the test She needed to know everything about which side I'm on Afghanistan, the Russians and even Vietnam Gun control and rock'n'roll and what to do with Guam Abortion, mob extortion and of course the neutron bomb For all my troubles, I never got to meet the mom