The blind man's seein' eye dog Pissed on the blind man's shoe The blind man said, here, rover-- Here's a piece of beef for you His wife said, don't reward him You can't just let that pass! The blind man said I gotta find his mouth, so I can kick him in the ass Bad jokes, lord, I love 'em Bad jokes, can't get enough of 'em Ooh-ooh-ooh-wee, bad jokes for me You got one, dusty? I got one Let's hear it When God created woman He gave her not two breasts, but three When the middle one got in the way God performed surgery Woman stood before him With the middle breast in hand Said, what do we do with the useless boob? And God created man Bad jokes, lord, I love 'em Bad jokes, can't get enough of 'em Ooh-ooh-ooh-wee, bad jokes for me Gramps turned eighty the other day And everybody was there He was dressed up in a brand-new suit Sittin' in his big arm chair When a beautiful, young, naked woman Stood up in front of the group She offered gramps some super sex— So he said, I'll take the soup! Bad jokes, lord, I love 'em Bad jokes, can't get enough of 'em Ooh-ooh-ooh-wee, bad jokes for me You ready for another one? Yeah, lay it on me Olie went to the neighborhood dance And he won the big door prize Was a toilet brush, and he took it home And the next week, one of the guys Said, olie, how's that toilet brush? The one you won from the neighbors Olie said, oh, it works pretty good But I prefer toilet paper Bad jokes, lord, I love 'em Bad jokes, can't get enough of 'em Ooh-ooh-ooh-wee, bad jokes for me Farmer had a champion bull Bred him two hundred times a year The farmer's wife said, two hundred times? Isn't that wonderful, dear? Maybe you oughta watch him Maybe he'll show you how Farmer said, he's a heck of a bull But it wasn't all with the same cow Come on, now Bad jokes, lord, I love 'em Bad jokes, can't get enough of 'em Ooh-ooh-ooh-wee, bad jokes for me You got another one, dusty? Actually, I do, did you hear about the viagra shipment that got stolen? No, who'd they think did it? Well, they don't know, but they're on the lookout for hardened criminals You got another one? I got another one, lefty Sven said to his friend, oh, I think my wife died His friend said, well, what do you mean, ‘you think'? Well, the sex is still the same, but the dishes are stacking up Hey, dusty? Yeah, lefty Did you know díarrhea was hereditary? No, I didn't Yeah, it runs in your jeans Hey, uh, lefty Go ahead Why do they call it P, M, S,? P, M, S,? Why, I don't know, why? 'Cause mad cow was already taken Hey, dusty Yeah, lefty? What do you get when you cross holy water with castor oil? I don't know, lefty, what do you get? A religious movement Hey, uh, hey, lefty, what did the elephant say to the naked man? What'd he say? It's cute, but can you really breathe through that thing? Come on! Bad jokes, lord, I love 'em Bad jokes, can't get enough of 'em Ooh-ooh-ooh-wee, bad jokes for me Bad jokes, man, I love 'em Bad jokes, can't get enough of 'em Ooh-ooh-ooh-wee, bad, whoo! Jokes for me!