Third Untitled

I woke up this morning relieved thinking quite clearly,
For the first time in day or maybe several weeks.
The sun it shone through my window pane and the birds were singing
A song so lovely it stayed in my ears. And it rang and rang and slowly faded away,
And now it's just the bitter taste of some old sweeter memory.

I walked by an old man in a cemetery, he was kneeling
And not so far off in time that could be me.
He just sat there at the headstone, he was begging
For God to take his life and let him rest here by wife,
Not feel that pain and finally be free.
And without another word I left that place of hurt and longing.

I ran into a friend he said he's seen some changes in me.
"Well there's this girl I wake up to who keeps me smiling,"
And as much as I complain and cry about my perfect life I know I've got it made.
It's just an awful mix of chemicals, these demons and black clouds follow me.
So many churches in this town, it must leave a lot of seats empty

I wonder how many in the pew and those singing,
Who's there only to be saved and who truly believes,
And who's left out on the streets where the dirty money sleeps.
And I think, what's their God done for me?
But not listen when I speak, lend a deaf ear and take my friends away from me
When I lay myself to sleep I let the day wash over me.
My girl, my friends, my blood-tied family,
My curses and blessings, if it weren't for you I'd be dead and buried.