Drunk By Noon

D                             C  
There once was a poodle who 
              G
thought he was a cowboy
D                        C       
He lived in a cage the size of 
    G
his thumb
D                               
And, though his white horse was a 
   C          G
box of toothpicks
D                                
He galloped around until he was 
C        G
hit by a car


-- Verse II --

D                    C       
Sometimes I flap my arms like a 
       G
hummingbird
D                     C           G
Just to remind myself I'll never fly
D                    C       
Sometimes I burn my arms with a 
       G
cigarette
Continues after the ad
D                        C       
Just to pretend I won't scream 
      G
when I die


-- Chorus --

      C                       G
If my life was as long as the moon's
     C                      G
I'd still be jealous of the sun
       C                   G
If my life lasted only one day
    Am        C        G
I'd still be drunk by noon
         Am        C        G
Yes I'd still be drunk by noon


*Whistling Verse*


-- Verse III --

D                   C             
Sometimes I hope I come down with 
 G
cancer
D                                 
At least then I'll get to stay in 
               C      G
bed and watch TV all day
D                        C       
And on my deathbed I'll get all 
       G
the answers
D                             C  
Even if all my questions are 
    G
taken away