Carrot Juice Is Murder

D

[Verse 1]
G         D            Em       
Listen up brothers and sisters, 
C            D         G
come hear my desperate tale
  G            D          Em      
I speak of our friends of nature, 
C              D           G
trapped in the dirt like a jail
G         D         Em        C
Vegtables live in oppression, 
             D           G
served on our tables each night
     G          D          Em    
This killing of veggies is 
   C        D           G
madness, I say we take up the fight

[Pre-chorus]
D                   G          D
Salads are only for murderers, 
                        G
cole slaw's a fascist regime
D                                
Don't think that they don't have 
G         C                      
feelings, just 'cause a radish 
    D
can't scream

[Chorus]
G              D           
I've heard the screams of the 
   Em
vegetables, (scream, scream, scream)
C                          D
watching their skins being peeled 
(having their insides revealed)
G          D               Em
Grated and steamed with no mercy, 
(burning up calories)
C          D          G
how do you think that feels? (bet it
 hurts real bad)
G            D           Em
Carrot juice constitutes murder, 
(and that's a real crime)
C                       D
greenhouses prisons for slaves (let 
my vegetables go)
     G            D      
It's time to stop all this 
  Em
gardening, (It's dirty as hell)
C            D       G
let's call a spade a spade (is a 
spade, is a spade, is a spade, is 
a...)

Continues after the ad
[Verse 2]
G       D          Em      C   
I saw a man eating celery, so I
      D             G
 beat him black and blue
   G       D         Em          
If he ever touches a sprout 
       C        D        G
again, I'll bite him clean in two
G     D         Em        C    
I'm a political prisoner, 
        D          G
trapped in a windowless cage
G                    D            
'cause I stopped the slaughter of 
Em          C            D       
turnips, by killing five men in a 
 G
rage

[Pre-chorus]
D                        G       
I told the judge when he 
      D                 G
sentenced me, this is my finest hour
D                       G     C 
I'd kill those farmers again, 
                         D
just to save one more cauliflower

[Chorus]
G              D           
I've heard the screams of the 
   Em
vegetables, (scream, scream, scream)
C                          D
watching their skins being peeled 
(having their insides revealed)
G          D               Em
Grated and steamed with no mercy, 
(burning up calories)
C          D          G
how do you think that feels? (bet it
 hurts real bad)
G            D           Em
Carrot juice constitutes murder, 
(and that's a real crime)
C                       D
greenhouses prisons for slaves (let 
my vegetables go)
     G            D      
It's time to stop all this 
  Em
gardening, (It's dirty as hell)
C            D       G
let's call a spade a spade (is a 
spade, is a spade, is a spade, is 
a...)

[Bridge]
Am                   Em
How low as people do we dare to 
stoop
C                      G
Making young broccolis bleed in the 
soup
Am                  Em
Untie your beans, uncage your 
tomatoes
    C                         D
Let potted plants free, don't mash 
that potato!

[Other]
G              D           
I've heard the screams of the 
   Em
vegetables, (scream, scream, scream)
C                          D
watching their skins being peeled 
(fates in the stir fry are sealed)
G          D               Em
Grated and steamed with no mercy, 
(you fat gourmet slob)
C          D          G
how do you think that feels? (leave 
them out in the fields)
G            D           Em
Carrot juice constitutes murder, 
(V8's genocide)
C                       D
greenhouses prisons for slaves (yes 
your compost's a grave)
     G            D      
It's time to stop all this 
  Em
gardening, (take up macrame)
C            D       G
let's call a spade a spade (is a 
spade, is a spade, is a spade, is a 
spade)

(Spoken)
Power to the peas! Give peas a 
chance!

(Sung to the tune of Give Peace a 
Chance)
G          D7                    
All we are saying is give peas a 
G
chance