Father's Eyes

I have my father's eyes and my mother's heartbeat
When the two collide, it feels a bit overwhelming
This isn't what I imagined
This isnt what I planned for
There is no way to heal the pain of watching all you love decay

I keep a journal to flush out my thoughts but publishing may be a grave mistake
Tell me, does the anguish keep you entertained?

She wore a white lace dress with her hair in waves
Lips red like the demons that she prayed away
Sought solace, saw the bottle, quickly swept her face
She walked away

My father was a coward, my mother dangled from his precipice
The days I went to church, trusting the lord, I never noticed it
If I did the things he did, carried on inside that vein
Could I ever live it down? That vision I can't shake

Does a man reflect a bloodline?
Am I bound by that fate?
Am I designed to be a replica of an image that I hate?
Lace the words I write with urgency
My motivation with the same
May the liquid fill his veins with what she'd never dare to say
A wake; a shame; a page; a stain
A frame without a picture; some bruised and barren thing
Some fully made up face only existing in your sleep
A love you fucking wasted
You force the touch but it can't breathe

Soil my blood, you're not my father
(These eyes)
Soil my blood, you're not my father
(These eyes)
Leave me behind; leave me to suffer
(These eyes)
Leave me behind; leave me forever
Pray all you want, I still have your eyes