Raincloud

My skin isn't soft like the people I love
It is rough, it is blemished like me
My hair does not fall like the waves in the ocean
It's messy and damaged, unclean

And God, I try hard to fit in any place
Put a smile on my face, but I can't change, and I'm tired
I am tired
And I try to be just like everyone else
Nobody will love you if you can't love yourself
Is that true?
Do you hate me too?

When I'm floating like a rain cloud
And I can't hear what you say
Hold me near, let the world disappear
I'm so close, yet I'm so far away

Before the storm even started
I know it would be this way
I fought for so long against everything wrong
But I'm the reason that I'm not okay

So feel all the shadows and darkness creep in
That's when I know it's about to begin
Never game me a chance, no, I never could win
I will forever mourn what could have been

My body's not made in the most perfect shape
I just feel clumsy and cold
And my heart is not strong, I just pull it along
Dragging all of this weight gets so old

And God, it's all wrong, I just don't have the strenght
To do this all again, even for one more day
I am tired
I'm just tired
I need to get better, I need to find help
But nobody loves because I hate myself and it's true
What else is there to do?

When I'm floating like a rain cloud
And I can't hear what you say
Hold me near, let the world desappear
I'm so close, yet I'm so far away

Before the storm even started
I knew it would be this way
I fought for so long against everything wrong
But I'm the reason that I'm not okay

So feel all the shadows and darkness creep in
That's when I know it's about to begin
Never gave me a chance, no, I never could win
I will forever mourn what could have been