Shared Eyes

Oh hey, it’s me again
And while I know your time’s so quickly spent
I figured this would be
A great time to misunderstand me

I used to beg and plead
But you sit there ever silently
Cause you can’t hear it
Won’t stand to hear it

So I’ll shout this behind your back
But whisper carefully planned facts
To the eyes that stare beyond my own
I’ll tell those eyes I share with you, all of my tales poisoned with truth
And force them down so I can watch you choke

I’m not who you think I am
If you think of me at all
In that callus ground of loneliness, you’ve planted my upward fall

You’ve let hate blossom now you cannot recognise
If you’d only shared your eyes
Your eyes, you share with mine

I wish your silence came from hate
Then at least I’d know why I’m to blame!
But a fool I’d stay to pray within a drought to drown in the rain
So fine
I’ll find
The rage to scorch out on my own
And in my wreckage may you burn upon your throne
Forged from unbloodied stones

Do you see yourself in me?
So your inner harm finds somewhere else to be
The reflection stings so rejection brings-
A mirrored shame that’s shared ‘tween our pair of frames

It seems
To me
That I have always been the problem
Though I’d wish to solve it
Foolishly I’ve gone and charred each star that’s fallen

I’m not who I think I am
When you think you’ve seen it all
In this frozen state of apathy
I’ve blossomed with every flaw

To hate I’ve fallen, and I now can’t recognize
Your eyes that you despise
The eyes you share with mine

This feels wrong
It’s not playing out right
How am I colder now
Upon a bridge, I chose to ignite?

Am I all wrong?
It doesn’t feel like it should
This hollow triumph doesn’t
Fill the pain I thought it would

I’ve spent so long, why do I pity you now
You’ve yet to change, so in your place, I’ve learned to torture myself
How could you be so blind?
You close your eyes but open mine
I hate the way you make me hate myself for sharing eyes!

You’re not who you think you are!
And I wish I never knew
I don’t want to see the irony
That you hate me for being you

Pushed me to walk ‘neath starless skies!
Because I’ll never shine as bright as the light of your eye

What good is it to even try?
You’ll never hear, or see, or face
All the parts of you you despise-
Come to life, standing right ‘fore your eyes-
In spite-
Reminding both of us have wished on a starless night

You can try as you might
You can lie, fantasize
But we both see your eyes
Your eyes
In mine