Left Brain Right Brain

      A      A*    B*    B       
E|----0------5-----7-----2-----4--
B|----2------5-----7-----4-----6--
G|----2------6-----8-----4-----6--
D|----2------7-----9-----4-----6--
A|----0------7-----9-----2-----4--
E|-----------5-----7--------------
  C# C#m     C#*     E*     E         
E|---4------9-------7------0-------
B|---5------9-------9------0-------
G|---6------10------9------1-------
D|---6------11------9------2-------
A|---4------11------7------2-------
E|----------9--------------0-------
  D*     D
E|5--------2-------| 
B|7--------3-------| 
G|7--------2-------| 
D|7--------0-------| 
A|5----------------| 
E|-----------------| 





A: 577655
B*: 799877
C#: x46664
C#m: x46654
B: x24442
E*:x79997
D*: x57775
C#*: 9[11][11][10]99
D: xx0232




[Intro]

N.C
(Hello, patient 24602)
N.C
Hi, I'm sorry-
N.C
(How are you feeling?)
N.C
Not great-
N.C
(Has the treatment been working?)
N.C
No, it hasn't been-
N.C
(What are your remaining symptoms?)
N.C
I just, I- I internalize my 
feelings, I just- I have trouble 
artic- like, other people and 
relating to them,
and just-
N.C
(So basically, you're still a little
 bitch.)
N.C
Ah, real mature of you, disembodied 
voice, up there-
N.C
(I'm just joking, [n-word])
N.C
We're right by Oakland, careful with
 that shit
N.C
(I'm not human, I can say whatever I
 want.)
N.C
Alright, just get to the- what- 
what's wrong with me? what is wrong 
with me, please?
N.C
(Your emotions and your logic are at
 war.)
N.C
Okay-
N.C
(Your creativity and your analysis 
are at war. And most simply, your 
left and your right brain are at 
war.)
N.C
My left and my right-
N.C
(To fix the problem, we must 
separate them from each other.)
N.C
Separ-
N.C
(Splitting you neurological 
functions in 5... *counting down*)
N.C
just- we book an appointment, we 
don't just start counting down... 
*heh*
N.C
(This may hurt a bit...)
N.C
I don't even know what IT is...
N.C
(0)
N.C
Just.. just-
N.C
(mechanical  SFX)
N.C
(Isolation complete.)



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N.C
Computer voice: This is Bo's left 
brain. Objective, logical, cold, 
analytical, aware of patterns, aware
 of
trends, he's efficient, and a prick.
C            E               
  C: This is Bo's right brain. 
F            D                  
Subjective, creative, sensory, 
C                 E      
aware of feelings, aware of 
            F
emotions, he's

emotional-
    D
Bo: yes

C: And an idiot.
        E
B: it's your opinion, not just...
   E
C: Ok boys...
                            D
B: Be careful with opinions, 
nyuuh[??]

C: Play nice.


[Verse 1]

C                                 
I am the left brain, I am the left
          E
 brain. I work really hard til' my 
inevitable death brain.
C                                 
  You got a job to do, you better 
        D                        
do it right, and the right way is 
                        C
with the left brain's might.
       A*         C#
I like Oreo's and pussy!
  B
*Yeah, in that order*
(strum each chord only once)And I 
C#                   A*         
cried for at least an hour after
C#m                 B
 watching toy story three.
          C#                   A*
I am the right brain (shalalalala)
        C#m               B
I have feelings (Shalalalala)
             C#                    
I'm a little all over the place, 
       A*
but I'm lustful, trustful
         C#m                    B 
(sustain)
And I'm looking for somebody to love
 *or put my penis in*

[Verse 2]
C#m                               
Here comes a female, here comes a 
   E    A*
female.
Puff your chest out, take your phone
                B*    C#m
 and check your email.
Our evolutionary purpose is 
  A*        B
repopulate,
          E            Em7
So gather data now and see if she's 
a possible mate.
B*                                
 Holy fuck, I think she might be 
   B
the one!
                  A*               
There's something about her, I just
       C#m
 can't describe it,
N.C
tits.
B*                                
 I am the Earth, she is the 
  A*
glorious sun,
              C#m               
I want her to trust me, and just 
             B
want her to sit on my face.

Sit-

[Verse 3]

N.C
Alright now right brain you're being
 insane
B*                             C#m
No left brain, I'm just being alive,
                  A*
You should try it, you might like it
B                                 
I worked hard to give him 
                  C#
everything he cared about.
You were worried about the things 
                         B
that he was scared about.
I'm calm and collected when you act 
     D#
wild,
                                  E
I am the adult, you are the child.
                                 B*
You think you're the right one every
 time,
                   A*
You think you know everything,
               C#m
You don't know anything at all.
B*                                
Half of his problems were supposed
      B
 to be mine,
               A*
But you wanted everything
(strum each chord once)I hope that 
      C#m                          E
you're happy because he's sure not.

(spoken)
E
According to my calculations, you're
 a pussy.
E*
Name-calling? Really, we're gonna do
 name-calling?
E                             
I'm not calling names, I'm just 
stating the facts and the fact is, 
            B
you are a quivering pussy.
E*            C#m            E
I'm the pussy? well, at least I 
don't play with toys still.
E                                 
Okay, Rubik's cubes are not toys, 
              B
they keep my spatial reasoning 
skills sharp-
                      E*           
Left brain plays with toys! look at
        C#m          D*
 you, Johnny fucking... toy player.
N.C
Well, at least I did my fucking job!
 I kept him working, I kept him 
productive,
N.C
You were supposed to look after him,
 you were supposed to keep him 
emotionally stable through all this
N.C
And now you're trying to blame me 
for how he's feeling. How he's 
feeling!
N.C
If he's feeling unhappy it's because
 you failed him.
N.C
You did this to him. He hates you, I
 know he does, he fucking hates you!

[Verse 4]

        C#*
*sobbing*
B*                          A*
  Right brain, look, I'm sorry.
N.C
No, you're not...

C#* B* A* C#m

      C#                      B   
Look, maybe there's something that
          A           E
 we could do together...

E  E  E  E  E  E  E  E  E
          Together?
C#                     B         
Take the best parts of both of 
             A    E
us, put them together.
E
I'm listening...
         A                C#m     
It would let you let your feelings
               A*     B
 out, it would let me analyse.
   A                 C#m          
So you could man the themes; I'll 
       A*   B
man the form.
     A              C#m           
It's something that George Carlin 
          A*                  
did, it's something that Steve 
 B
Martin did,
     A                      C#m   
It's something special that we 
        B
could both perform...
N.C
Do you know what it is?
N.C
Juggling, we could juggle, and 
juggle our cares away!
N.C
...
N.C
Comedy, it was comedy, we could do 
comedy together.