She got a Valentine from Gary I opened it up it said "Would you please be mine." I sent her flowers and some candy She opened them up and said "You're trying to make me fat" (Now) I just want a new girlfriend (Yeah) I just want someone to make me laugh I just want a new girlfriend (Yeah) I just want someone to laugh at me Not too smart Not too tall Likes to watch TV and play basketball I bought a car and let her drive it She opened the door and said "Oh bother, this is red." I gave her all my notes from algebra Yeah, she opened 'em up and said, "I can't believe you're sostupid." (Now) I just want a new girlfriend (Yeah) I just want someone to make me laugh I just want a new girlfriend (Yeah) I just want someone to laugh at me Not too smart Not too tall Likes to watch TV and play basketball Play basketball Play basketball Play basketball (BREAK) (Now) I just want a new girlfriend (Yeah) I just want someone to make me laugh I just want a new girlfriend (Yeah) I just want someone to laugh at me I just want her to look me (yep) I just want her to talk to me (yeah) I won't ever make her wash my car (no!) I won't ever take a walk, not unless she's there.