Sell It And They Will Come

A
I fell asleep on the couch last 
night, woke up with the TV on
A
There was a woman in tight cotton 
exercise shorts
A
And a big plastic machine she was 
climbing on
A
She said "The Aba-cycle guarantees 
ten inches off your waist
A                               
And 50 pounds in just 3 minutes a 
   D
day."
          A
I went to bed knowing the revolution
 had been postponed
    D               E7   A
And everything was okay


[Chorus]

        A               D     
You can try it, you can buy it, 
  A
it'll help you in bed
             E7                    
But don't be fooled folks, there's 
      A
only one
      A             D             
I forget the guy's name but I know
   A
 somebody said
A            E7         A    D  
Sell it and they will come boys,
  A            E7        A
 sell it and they will come


[Verse 2]

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I switched the channels and there 
was Evel Knievel
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I thought that he was dead
A
I found myself sitting there 
quietly, hanging on every word he 
said
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"Now folks, the stimulator removes 
all pain from your life.
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And the best day of your life will 
be when you try this little device 
out."
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The camera moved in as he said, 
"Now, let me tell you ladies and 
gentlemen,
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A
Pain is something old Evel knows a 
little about"


[Chorus]

        A               D       A
You can buy it, you can try it, go 
right ahead
            E7                     
But don't be fooled folks, there's 
     A
only one.
      A             D             
I forget the guy's name but i know
  A
 somebody said
A           E7         A    D   
Sell it and they will come boys,
  A           E7         A
 sell it and they will come


[Verse 3]

A
And a fellow comes on shouting "Free
 haircuts for life!"
A
Somehow you cut your hair with a 
vacuum cleaner
A
And then I switched the channels and
 there was Dionne Warwick
A
Communing with her psychic friends
A
I watched for hours, taking warmth, 
comfort, and pleasure
A                        D
In the things that I despise
A
Touched by how much they needed me
         D           E7           
And that happy desperation in 
    A
their eyes


[Chorus]


        A               D     
You can buy it, you can try it, 
         A
it'll help you in bed.
             E7                    
But don't be fooled folks, there's 
      A
only one.
      A             D             
I forget the guy's name but i know
  A
 somebody said
A           E7         A    D   
Sell it and they will come boys,
  A           E7         A
 sell it and they will come


[Verse 4]

A                             
So, to Dionne, Cher, and all my 
late-night friends, I drink to your 
D
health
A
And Tony Little, America's personal 
trainer, please kill yourself
A
Now I've sold a few things myself in
 my time, and by the way folks,
A                                 
There's some t-shirts on your way 
    D
outside
A
Well, last night I dreamed of 
lipstick and tight little cotton 
shorts
A
"Harder, faster", she whispered in 
my ear.
A
"One, two, three, four, five"
A      E7    A     D     A    
Ride, sally ride, girl, ride 
E7    A
sally ride.


[Chorus]

        A               D     
You can buy it, you can try it, 
         A
it'll help you in bed.
             E7                    
But don't be fooled folks, there's 
      A
only one
      A             D             
I forget the guy's name but i know
  A
 somebody said
A           E7         A    D   
Sell it and they will come boys,
  A           E7        A
 sell it and they will come