Waking Up (...again)

Budd Dwyer

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    Black clouds slowly give way
    Reality seeps in again
    Dazed, shaken up, why do I always seem to wake up?
    The awkward silence of morning
    And the sun is back
    More terrifying than my dreams
    Trapped in the same place for another grueling day
    My brains still soaked in booze and I’m every bit as miserable.
    Blissfully I start to trail off…worry free til something else comes up.

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    Inevitably the feelings of dread come back
    Eyelids grown heavy, Scratching til I see blood
    Needling presence makes me forget everything I love
    Gnawing at my sanity for countless time
    Why did I have to wake up?
    I can’t fucking bear it anymore
    Wanting the world to collapse and destroy my body
    So I won’t have to feel this way or think these thoughts ever again.

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