s u m m e r

This is where I lost you yesterday
And where I first saw her name
Written in the blank space of a torn up receipt

This is how you never heard your name
And how your mind was torn away
A sudden jolt from a long falling dream

And last night
Some kind of banshee was screaming out
From the place I was before
Its voice was sick and desperate
While begging her for more

It's what keeps us both together from a lifetime away
No time passed still trapped in that day

Shadows of palm trees
Draw patterns on hotel curtains
She's dead asleep in an unmade bed
She never sleeps alone

When we had all summer
Until the winter kills us all
You wanted to wait
For some sort of fate
Believing that God would save us
It's worthless
You know it's no one's fault but ours
The only one we love's not with us anymore

I'll lose my identity to not be your enemy
You're not another victim of the things that she did to me
I just need stability but monotony's killing me
Denying the lies an exercise in futility

I'm not better off with fake love
A life that i can't think of
Or know what to make of it
Death from inside

Last night
I thought about giving up on everything
And settling down with you
I know it sounds so stupid
After all that we've been through

Maybe I'm just afraid to feel anything but hate
It's just a miserable state

Portraits of children
Line hallways, a broken household
I'm clawing right through
The wallpaper that's peeling off the walls

When we had all summer
Until the winter killed us all
You wanted to wait
For some sort of fate
Believing that God would save us
It's worthless
You know it’s no one's fault but ours
The only one we love's not with us anymore
I don’t want to die

He's not with us anymore
When we had all summer
Winter
He's not with us anymore

Shadows of palm trees
Draw patterns on hotel curtains
She's dead asleep in an unmade bed
She never sleeps alone

I loved you last summer
We lost him last winter
Trapped in my bed
I called you and said
I'm gonna fucking end it
It's worthless
You know we'll never change the past
I'll only hide behind the guilt from what I've done