The John Birch Society

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[Intro]
         C                         
Oh we're meeting at the courthouse 
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at eight o'clock tonight
C                                 
You just come in the door and take
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 the first turn to the right
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Be careful when you get there, 
              Am
we'd hate to be bereft
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But we're taking down the names 
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of everybody turning left


[Refrain]
                G7                 
Oh we're the John Birch Society, 
   C
the John Birch Society
G7                            
Here to save our country from a 
  C
communistic plot
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Join the John Birch Society, help 
            Am
us fill the ranks
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To get this movement started, 
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we need lots of tools and cranks


[Verse 2]
         C                   
Now there's no one that we're 
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certain the Kremlin doesn't touch
C                                 
We think that Westbrook Pegler* 
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doth protest a bit too much
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We only hail the hero from whom 
              Am
we got our name
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We're not sure what he did, but 
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he's our hero all the same


[Refrain]
                G7                 
Oh we're the John Birch Society, 
   C
the John Birch Society
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G7                              C
Socialism is the ism dismalist of 
all
            G7               E    
Join the John Birch Society, 
            Am
there's so much to do
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Have you heard they're serving 
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vodka at the W.C.T.U.


[Verse 3]
         C                         
Well you've heard about the agents 
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that we've already named
C                             
Well M.C.A. has agents that are 
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flatly unashamed
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We're after Rosie Clooney, we've 
              Am
gotten Pinky Lee
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And the day we get Red Skelton 
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won't that be a victory


[Refrain]
                G7                 
Oh we're the John Birch Society, 
   C
the John Birch Society
G                              
Norman Vincent Peale** may think 
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he's kidding us along
     E                Am        E
But the John Birch Society knows 
              Am
he spilled the beans
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He keeps on preaching brotherhood,
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 but we know what he means


[Verse 4]
     E                Am        E
We'll teach you how to spot 'em 
              Am
in the cities or the sticks
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For even Jasper Junction is just 
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full of Bolsheviks
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The CIA's subversive and so's the
              Am
 FCC
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There's no one left but thee and 
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we, and we're not sure of thee


[Refrain]
                G7                 
Oh we're the John Birch Society, 
   C
the John Birch Society
G7                            
Here to save our country from a 
  C
Communistic plot
            G7               E    
Join the John Birch Society, 
            Am
holding off the Reds
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We'll use our hands and hearts, 
    A7       D7                  C
and if we must, we'll use our heads


[Verse 5]
         C                      
Do you want Justice Warren to be 
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your Commissar?
C                              D7
Do you want Mrs. Khrushchev in 
               G7
there with the DAR?
     E                Am        E
You cannot trust your neighbors, 
              Am
or even next-of-kin
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If mommy is a Commie then you 
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gotta turn her in


[Refrain]
                G7                 
Oh we're the John Birch Society, 
   C
the John Birch Society
G7                              C
Fighting for the right to fight the 
right fight for the right
G7                            
Join the John Birch Society, as 
  C
we're marching on
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We'll all be glad to see you 
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when we're meeting in the John