Deceptive Felicity

Sink within myself to introspect my obnoxious responses
to enfeeble unintended impulsions
Despised emotions restrained

Fear to lose my balance, the rational grip
...to be disconnected from my mind
Shield myself with repugnance,
dispraising selfindulgence
Emotions deracinated

Despised emotions restrained
It's nothing but a deceptive felicity

Gazing at a haze, at the image of my projection...
a creation of ultimate perfection.
Its appeal sustains, persists in my mind
Unexpectedly blinding my eyes
Desiderating affection, subtitute its absence
Drowning in an ebulliency of euphoria

Trying to maintain the suppress, the rejection
and to impede more luring inducements
Deceptive felicity

Almost too easy to leave my values behind
for these temporary thoughts
No... may not yield to the temptation

Disdaining these impulsive thoughts
I'm sickening the inquietude within
Compunction... desecrating the contempting, enshrined image

To deplete, to erase the stigmatization of my infirmity

To be drifted by intimacy and sphere
is equal to pathetic vulnerability