Walking a Midget

Cretin

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    I own a happy midget-I walk him in the yard
    He's tethered to a leash-we don't go very far
    Stumpy arms and legs-prancing by my side
    He trains so hard-I promised him-one day we'd go outside

    Oh, my proud little man
    Summersaults and handstands
    Show me those silly midget tricks
    When I clap my hands-he jumps and does a flip

    I tell him that it's time-he shrieks and wets the floor
    When I attach his leash-he drags me to the door
    We will show the people-who used to laugh at you
    Just what a special midget-can be trained to do

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    Oh, stubby dwarven friend
    My companion till the end
    Runs just as fast as he can
    Don't forget to flip-when I clap my hands

    [Guitar solo: Martinez]

    Strutting down the street-he's on his brand new leash
    He tries to jump on people-I keep him out of reach
    All the people ask me-why I treat him wrong
    I tell them they did worse-then we sing our song

    "Happy little midget, running down the street
    Happy little midget, skip on stunted feet
    Walk my funny midget, watch him do his tricks"

    Then I clap my hands-he jumps and does a flip

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