The Daily Mail Song

A
Royals on the first page, swine flu 
and road rage

Find Maddie, foreign baddie, put him
 in a big cage
D
Bureaucratic red tape, Facebook gang
 rape
A
Gordon out, Dave in, before the 
country caves in
E                     D          
Ian Huntley gets 
              A
his own Jacuzzi and a gym in jail
     E                         D  
It's absolutely true because I 
                  A
read it in the Daily Mail

[Verse 2]
A
Bring back capital punishment for 
pedophiles

Photo feature on schoolgirl skirt 
styles
D
Binge Britain, single mums, 
pensioners, hoodie scum
A
Oversexed and underaged, foreign 
stories half a page
E                           
Criminals get Marks & Spencer 
   D                          A
vouchers when released on bail
Continues after the ad
Remove ads
     E                         D  
It's absolutely true because I 
                  A
read it in the Daily Mail

[Verse 3]
A
Ban this gay smut, I'm not racist 
but

Car crime, knife crime, 
hang-the-cheating-wife time
D
Pop stars take drugs, teen boys wear
 hoods
A
Sports stars have sex, bears shit in
 woods
E                     D          
Brussels politicians want to stop
                     A
 us drinking English ale
     E                         D  
It's absolutely true because I 
                  A
read it in the Daily Mail

[Verse 4]
A
Climategate, petrol prices, 
potholes, credit crisis

Gypsies, Russell Brand, time we all 
took a stand
D
Modern art, where to start? Trash 
the lot of it
A
Apart from statuette of puppy, 50 
quid plus P&P
E                          D     
Muslim women hiding stolen goods 
              A
behind their veil
     E                         D  
It's absolutely true because I 
                  A
read it in the Daily Mail

[Verse 5]
A
Poles paid to give blood, 
immigration like a flood

Soft touch British Isles, cancer 
from your mobiles
D
Cancer from your laptop, cancer from
 your root crop
E                          A
Cancer from your shoes, from your 
dog, from your pen top
E                       
Immigrants arriving on an 
  D             F#m
unprecedented scale
     E                         D  
It's absolutely true because I 
                  A
read it in the Daily Mail
     E                         D  
They never mince their words in 
                  A
the good ol' Daily Mail
     E                        
It's absolutely true Because I 
     D                             
gather all my views From the Daily 
   A
Mail