Never Relaxed

INTRO (Spoken)

Now without any further ado I'm gonna do a little soft shoe and a little boogaloo. For you.
If you want me to. I will. WILL.


( C )          C         G              C
There was this kid named Syd and he was born
C                G                    C
Maybe the doctor hit him a little too hard
C       F                              C
He just seemed to have gotten off to a bad start
C                       G             C
Never relaxed, never relaxed, never relaxed

C                    G                       C
Big brothers and big sisters 'came lots of attention
C             G           C
But Syd was a hyperactive kid
C       F                        C
He just never seemed able to sit still
C                       G              C
Never relaxed, never relaxed, never relaxed
C        F       C
Never rela-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-axed
C                       G              C
Never relaxed, never relaxed, never relaxed

C                G           C
Unlike the other kids on his block
C           G            C
Syd never learned how to walk
C       F                 C
He just ran around acting nervous
C                      G               C
Never relaxed, never relaxed, never relaxed


C          G        C
He sat in school in detention
C              G               C
Drawing funny pictures on the wall
C     F                            C
Not a moment of peace did Syd ever find
C                       G              C
Never relaxed, never relaxed, never relaxed
C         F          C
Never rela-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-axed
C                       G              C
Never relaxed, never relaxed, never relaxed

C                G            C
Now when Syd discovered masturbation
C                 G                C
He just couldn't keep a good thing down

C      F                        C
But it didn't help much his condition
C                      G               C
Never relaxed, never relaxed, never relaxed


C          G          C
Syd signed up for the army
C                      G              C
'Cause he got tired of working in the pottery
C        F                          F
And they sent him over to a foreign country
C                      G               C
Never relaxed, never relaxed, never relaxed


C            G            C
Syd met this girl in East Germany
C                              G            C
And she invited him up to her room for some tea
C        F                             C
Then she pulled out a gun and took his money
C                      G               C
Never relaxed, never relaxed, never relaxed

C        G               C
She shot Syd through the head
C       G                C
And Syd died and went to hell
       F                           C
And he burned and he burned and he yelled
 C                             G               C
"I never been relaxed, never relaxed, never relaxed"

C              G               C
Now the Devil said "This ain't fair
C                      G                            C
'Cause people who come here have had their share of comfort"
C      F                     C
So he sat Syd in a reclining chair
C      G               C
But it was an electric chair
C        F       C
Never rela-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-axed
C                    G                C      G  C
Never relaxed, never relaxed, never relaxed