Stan

Em            C                   
My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' 
D
why
    G      D         Em
Got out of bed at all
            C                 D
The morning rain clouds up my window
    G       D         Em
And I can't see at all
         C                D
And even if I could it'll all be 
gray
         G       D         Em
But your picture on my wall
        C               A/C#
It reminds me that it's not so bad
     G      D   Em
It's not so bad
Em            C                   
My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' 
D
why
    G      D         Em
Got out of bed at all
            C                 D
The morning rain clouds up my window
    G       D         Em
And I can't see at all
         C                D
And even if I could it'll all be 
gray
         G       D         Em
But your picture on my wall
        C               A/C#
It reminds me that it's not so bad
     C
It's not so bad

[Verse 1]
Em                     C     
Dear Slim, I wrote you, but you 
                      D
still ain't callin
I left my cell, my pager, and my 
G                    D   Em
home phone at the bottom
                               C   
I sent two letters back in Autumn, 
                          D
you must not have got 'em
There probably was a problem with 
    G              D
the post office or somethin'
Em                                 
Sometimes I scribble addresses too 
C                     D
sloppy when I jot 'em
                        G      
But anyway, what's been up man, 
            D        Em
how's your daughter?
My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm 
          C
bout to be a father
            A/C#                   
If I have a daughter, guess what 
            C
I'm a call her
                      Em
I'm a name her Bonnie
                        C
I read about your Uncle Ronnie too, 
I'm sorry
 D                              
I had a friend kill himself over 
  G                    D        Em
some b**** who didn't want him
I know you probably hear this every 
   C                         D
day, but I'm your biggest fan
                       G        
I even got that underground s*** 
                   D     Em
that you did with Skam
                          C      
I got a room full of your posters 
                       D
and your pictures man
                              G    
I like that s*** you did with 
            D             Em
Rawkus too, that s*** was phat
                    C
Anyways, I hope you get this man, 
hit me back
A/C#                          
Just to chat, truly yours, your 
  C
biggest fan, this is Stan

[Chorus]
Em            C                   
My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' 
D
why
    G      D         Em
Got out of bed at all
            C                 D
The morning rain clouds up my window
    G       D         Em
And I can't see at all
         C                D
And even if I could it'll all be 
gray
         G       D         Em
But your picture on my wall
        C               A/C#
It reminds me that it's not so bad
     C         Em
It's not so bad

[Verse 2]
     Em                            
Dear Slim, you still ain't called 
   C
or wrote, I hope you have a chance,
D                            
I ain't mad, I think it's just 
  G                                
f***** up that you don't answer 
   Em
fans
                            C
If you didn't wanna talk to me 
outside your concert
           D                       
You didn't have to, but you 
            G             D
could've signed an autograph for 
Matthew
         Em                        
That's my little brother man, he's 
     C
only six years old
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                 D
We waited in the blistering cold for
 you
    G                  D          
For four hours and you just said 
  Em
no
That's pretty s****y man, you're 
C
like his f***ing idol
   A/C#                            
He wants to be just like you man, 
   C                       Em
he likes you more than I do
                        C
I ain't that mad though, I just 
don't like being lied to
      D                       G   
Remember when we met in Denver, 
            D
you said if I write you
          Em                       
You would write back, see I'm just 
    C
like you in a way
                D
I never knew my father neither
           G                  D   
He used to always cheat on my mom 
             Em
and beat her
                            C
I can relate to what you're saying 
in your songs
          D                        
So when I have a s****y day, I 
  G               D
drift away and put em on
              Em                   
Cause I don't really got s*** else,
              C
 so that s*** helps when I'm 
depressed
A/C#                        C
I even got a tattoo of your name 
across the chest
Em                             C
Sometimes I even cut myself to see 
how much it bleeds
         D                      
Its like adrenaline, the pain is 
      G             D
such a sudden rush for me
        Em                         
See everthing you say is real, and 
     C
I respect you cause you tell it
       D                           
My girlfriend's jealous, because I 
    G              D
talk about you 24/7
Em                                
But she don't know you like I know
     C
 you slim, no one does
D                                 
She don't know what it was like 
        G                 D
for people like us growin' up
          Em                       
You gotta call me man, I'll be the 
        C
biggest fan you'll ever lose
          A/C#
Sincerely yours, Stan, p.s.
C
We should be together too

[Chorus]
Em            C                   
My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' 
D
why
    G      D         Em
Got out of bed at all
            C                 D
The morning rain clouds up my window
    G       D         Em
And I can't see at all
         C                D
And even if I could it'll all be 
gray
         G       D         Em
But your picture on my wall
        C               A/C#
It reminds me that it's not so bad
     C
It's not so bad

[Verse 3]
Em    
Dear Mr 
                   C               
I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-My-Fans
     D

                              G    
This'll be the last package I ever 
             D
send your a**
              Em
It's been six months and still no 
words
           C
I don't deserve it
                  D
I know you got my last two letters
               G             
I wrote the addresses on them 
        D
perfect
Em                                
So this is my cassette I'm sending
    C
 you, I hope you hear it
    D                              
I'm in the car right now, I'm doin'
 G               D
 90 on the freeway
Em                           C   
Hey Slim, I drank a fifth of 
                   A/C#
vodka, dare me to drive?
                           C
You know that song by Phil Collins, 
In the Air of the Night
Em                                
About that guy who could've saved 
     C
that other guy from drowning
    D                           
But didn't, but Phil saw it all, 
G                         D
then at a show he found him
Em                          
That's kinda how this is, you 
           C
could've rescued me from drowning
         D                        
Now it's too late, I'm on a 1,000 
G            D
downers now, I'm drowsy
Em                          C
And all I wanted was a lousy letter 
or a call
D                                 
I hope you know I ripped all of 
   G           D
your pictures off my wall
Em                           C   
I love you Slim, we could've been
                       A/C#
 together, think about it
                    C              
You ruined it now, I hope you can't
                             Em
 sleep and you dream about it
                               C
And when you dream, I hope you can't
 sleep and you scream about it
D                             G  
I hope your conscience eats at 
                D                Em
you and you can't breathe without me
             C
See Slim, shut up b****, I'm trying 
to talk
D                       G   
Hey Slim, that's my girlfriend 
                    D
screamin' in the trunk
Em                                
But I didn't slit her throat, I 
            C
just tied her up, see I ain't like 
you
D                             
Cause if she suffocates, she'll 
         G                 D      Em
suffer more, then she'll die too
               C                   
Well, gotta go, I'm almost under 
            A/C#
the bridge now
                  C
Oh s***, I forgot, how am I supposed
 to send this s*** out?

[Instrumental] x2
Em C A/C# C

[Chorus]
Em            C                   
My tea's gone cold, I'm wonderin' 
D
why
    G      D         Em
Got out of bed at all
            C                 D
The morning rain clouds up my window
    G       D         Em
And I can't see at all
         C                D
And even if I could it'll all be 
gray
         G       D         Em
But your picture on my wall
        C               A/C#
It reminds me that it's not so bad
     C
It's not so bad

[Verse 4]
Em                            
Dear Stan, I meant to write you 
        C
sooner, but I've just been busy
D                                 
You say your girlfriend's pregnant
    G                  D
 now, how far along is she?
Em                                
Look, I'm really flattered you 
   C
would call your daughter that
              D
And here's an autograph for your 
brother
  G           D               Em
I wrote it on this Starter cap
                   C
I'm sorry I didn't see you at the 
show, I must've missed you
D                         
Don't think I did that s*** 
  G             D               Em
intentionally just to dis you
                             C     
But what's that s*** you said about
 you like to cut your wrists too?
A/C#

                                  C
I say that s*** just clownin' dog
                             Em
C'mon, how f***ed up is you?
                             C
You got some issues, Stan, I think 
you need some counseling
D                                 
To keep your a** from bouncin' off
     G                  D         Em
 the walls when you get down some
                              C
And what's this s*** about us meant 
to be together?
D                                  
That type of s*** will make me not 
G                    D     Em
want us to meet each other
I really think you and your 
C
girlfriend need each other
D                                 
Or maybe you just need to treat 
  G
her better
D                 Em             
I hope you get to read this 
             C
letter, I hope it reaches you in 
time
           A/C#                  
Before you hurt yourself, I think 
             C
that you'll be doin just fine
         Em                        
If you relax a little, I'm glad 
      C
that I inspire you, but Stan
    D                     
Why are you so mad? Try to 
      G                D          
understand, that I do want you as 
   Em
a fan
                         C
I just don't want you to do some 
crazy s***
            D                      
I seen this one s*** on the news a 
          G              D     
couple of weeks ago that made me 
       Em
sick
Some dude was drunk and drove his 
C
car over a bridge
            D                      
And had his girlfriend in his trunk
             G                 D
 and she was pregnant with his kid
           Em                    
And in the car they found a tape, 
        C
didn't say who it was to
        A/C#                    
Come to think about it, his name 
     C              Em
was, it was you...

[Ending]
Em
Damn