Gm Now the other day I was standing in line Bb And I'd been standing for, well, quite some time C I had a train to catch, I had a place to be D7 Sandwich in my hand, I was all set to leave. Gm I was ready to pay, just gonna beep and move Bb Just two more people in that infuriating que C And one of them's gone now; off they drive... D7 And this is when I meet the slowest man alive. Gm (4 bars) Gm He shuffles forward, tripping on every crack Bb Tapping every pocket, his front and back C Raises his arms in the air, "Oh dear, where's my cash?" D7 Just as he does so, there's a might splash Gm Pennies and fivers and ten p's and pounds Bb Fall from his arms and bounce on the ground C He chuckles. I crack, as down he bends D7 To pick up every last coin, fifties, twenties, and tens. Gm (4 bars) Gm Sandwich melting in hand, the slowest man in this world Bb Plonks his change on the counter, deals it out to the girl C "Uh oh!" he exclaims with a huff and a puff D7 "I don't think I have enough" Gm So just as I think I'll never get served Bb A new cashier appears after what we've observed C I bound forward, grab my uke from behind D7 I'm ready to blow this slow man's mind Gm (4 bars) Eb Bb Hey, Scattered Change, have you heard of bpay C Gm 'Cos I can purchase my sandwich in a unique way Eb Bb I'll tell you a bit more about it after this song C Gm But I'm paying with my uke and then I'm moving along Eb Bb As I smugly place down my uke on the machine C Bb C The slow man laughs at something that I haven't seen... Eb "I like your bpay sticker, Bb your lack of change and a purse, D7 but before you pay... Gm check where your sandwich is first!"