Dont Get Married

    Em                             A             Em
   Don't get married girl, You'll sign away your life
             G             D                  C     D      Em
   You may start off as a woman,  But you'll end up as the wife
             Em                             A            Em
   You could be a Vestal Virgin,  Take the veil and be a nun
        G           D                  C           B7
   But don't get married girl,  For marraige isn't fun
            E                                  Em               B7
   Oh it's fine when you're romancing, And he plays the lovers part
                A            E                 Em                   B7
   You're the roses in his garden, You're the flame that warms his heart
            A                 E                 A              E
   And his love will last forever,  And he'll promise you the moon
             B7                 E                  B7               E
   But just wait until you're wedded,  Then he'll sing a different tune
                 A       E                     A              E
   You're his tapioca pudding,   You're the dumplings in his stew
               A             E              Em           B7
   But he'll soon begin to wonder,  What he ever saw in you
             A                E                  A          E
   Sure he takes without complaining,  All the dishes you provide
            B7              E                 B7                 E
   For you see he's got to have,  His bit of jam tart,   On the side

      Em                              A          Em
   So don't get married girls,  It's very badly paid
             G                 D                   C     D      Em
   You may start off as the mistress,  But you'll end up as the maid
          Em                              A       Em
   Be a daring deep sea diver,    Be a polished polyglot
        G           D                   C           B7
   But don't get married girls,  For marriage is a plot
              E                                Em                   B7
   Aarh you seen him in  the morning,  With a face that looks like death
           A              E            Em            B7
   With dandruff on his pillow,  And tobacco on his breath
            A             E                   A             E
   And he needs some reassurance,   With his cup of tea in bed
               B7             E                B7                E
   For he's worried by the mortgage,  And the bald patch on his head
              A                    E                A               E
   And he's sure that you're his mother,  Lays his head upon your breast
           A                E              Em                   B7
   So you try to boost his ego,  Iron his shirt,  And warm his vest
             A              E                   A          E
   Then you get him off to work,   The mighty hunter is restored
            B7                     E                B7               E
   And he leaves you there with nothing,  But the dreams you can't afford

       Em                               A               Em
   So don't get married girls,  'Cause men are all the same
                 G                   D                   C    D       Em
   They'll just use you, When  they want you, You'd do better on the game
         Em                                 A             Em
   Be a call girl,  Be a stripper,  Be a hostess,   Be a whore
        G           D                   C           B7
   But don't get married girls,  For marriage is a bore
             E                                  Em             B7
   When he comes home in the evening,   He can hardly spare a look
            A                    E               Em                   B7
   All he says is ''What's for dinner?'',  After all you're just the cook
                 A              E               A                 E
   But when he takes you to a party,  Where he eye's you with a frown
            B7                 E                    B7              E
   For you know you've got to look your best,  You mustn't let him down
                A                  E                       A             E
   And he'll clutch you with that look,While 'ere's that twinkle in his eyes
                A            E                Em               B7
   Like he's entered for a raffle,   And he's won you for the prize
            A               E                  A                   E
   Ahh but when the partys over,  You'll be slogging through the sludge
             B7         E              B7              E
   Half the time a decoration,    The other half,  A drudge

       Em                          A                  Em
   So don't get married,   It'll drive you round the bend
           G                D                C      D      Em
   It's a lane without a turning,  It's the end without an end
           Em                            A            Em
   Take a lover every friday,  Take up tennis,  Be a nurse
        G           D                    C           B7
   But don't get married girls,   For marriage is a curse
             A               E                 A          E
   Then you get him off to work,  The mighty hunter is restored
             B7                    E                B7               E
   And he leaves you there with nothing,  But the dreams you can't afford