The Sick Note

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Dear Sir, I write this note to you
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 to tell you of me plight
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And at the time of writing, I am 
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not a pretty sight;
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My body is all black and blue, my 
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face a deathly gray
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And I write this note to say why 
          D7          G
Paddy's not at work today

[Verse 2]
      G              G6       
While working on the fourteenth 
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floor some bricks I had to clear;
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Now, to throw them down from such 
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a height was not a good idea
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The foreman wasn't very pleased, 
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he being an awkward sod
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He said I'd have to cart them down
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 the ladders in me hod

[Verse 3]
     G                  G6        
Now, clearing all these bricks by 
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hand it was so very slow
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So I hoisted up a barrel and 
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secured the rope below
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But in me haste to do the job I 
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was to blind to see
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       G            Em            
That a barrelful of building 
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bricks was heavier than me

[Verse 4]
G           G6                D 
So when I untied the rope the 
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barrel fell like lead
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And clinging tightly to the rope I 
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started up instead
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Well, I shot up like a rocket till
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 to my dismay I found
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That halfway up I met the bloody 
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barrel comming down

[Verse 5]
          G               G6      
Well, the barrel broke me shoulder
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 as to the ground it sped
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And when I reached the top I 
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banged the pully with my head
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Well, I clung on tight through 
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numbed shock from this almighty blow
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And the barrel spilled out half 
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the bricks fourteen floors below

[Verse 6]
     G                     G6     
Now, when these bricks had fallen 
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from the barrel to the floor
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I then outweighed the barrel and 
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so started down once more;
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Still clinging tightly to the 
    D                Em
rope, I sped towards the ground
      G             Em            
And I landed on the brocken bricks
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 that were all scattered round

[Verse 7]
        G                  G6     
Well, I lay there groaning on the 
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ground, I thought I'd passed the 
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worst
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When the barrel hit the 
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pully-wheel and then the bottom 
burst
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Well, a shower of bricks rained 
            D            Em
down on me, I hadn't got a hope
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As I lay there moaning on the 
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ground, I let go of the bloody rope

[Verse 8]
    G                 G6          
The barrel than being heavier, it 
D                 G
started down once more
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And landed right across me, as I 
A7           D
lay upon the floor
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Well, it broke three ribs and my 
               D          Em
left arm and I can only say
       G                Em        
That I hope you'll understand why 
        D7            G
Paddy's not at work today