Break A Bitch College

Good morning, class
This is your teacher, MJG
Look at me as I write my name on the board
Class, do you see my name?
Do you understand my name?

Well, listen
Okay
Class, today at Break-A-Bitch University
We will teach young bustas, playa-hatas
And all of these weak, narrow-minded young sissies
How to break a bitch
Now
Really, it's so easy

Mister G, I have a question
Yes?
Pimpology today is different than it was in the 70s
Aha
I wanna know how can anybody stroll today
And if so, what proceeds do we have to go through?

Well, check it out
First here's what you have to do

[MJG:]
It's time to let the p-i-m-p in the fuckin front do'
One mo' nigga cuttin paper on the down low
It's so twisted in this white man's society
Why it be hard for a nigga when he try to be
Independent, on his own with a plan
You hate it cause you can't understand how I can
Rearrange and change how your daughter was raised
And teach her how to constantly get paid when she's laid
Ain't no use in bein the freak of the city, you still ain't got no ducats
You want a rolex or ride buckets?
Bitch, listen cause you gots plenty of competition from these other hoes
Who think that you supposed
To fall dead, short, lame to the game
Don't worry, put them bitches in your pistol range
MJ fuckin G settin your mind free with the type of knowledge
Class has started, day number one in Break-A-Bitch College

And today, class
We have a guest speaker, Mister Fat Mac
Please introduce yourself...

Good evening, players, good evening
Eightball the Fat Mac here
I'm here to let you know
That these bitches, mean these bustas no good
You see what I'm sayin?
Now first of all, class
Are there any questions?

Ah yes, Mister Eightball
You bein a Professor of Pimpology
Tell me how these niggas let these hoes
Get em caught up in that fuck shit

Alright buddy, check this out...

[Eightball:]
Once again here I come pushin that funk into your ear
Do you recall Eightball, the player of the year
Calm cause I'm cool, and I'm cool cause I'm calm
Leavin hoes shell-shocked like they fall in Vietnam
Mayn, some have game, but most of them can't handle this
Those that I think are stars, end up bein scandalous
Welfare recipients, crib full of rugrats
Boost a couple of shirts, and now the bitch think she all that
Freakazoids have a nigga noid steppin up to me
Hoes that'll fuck you fast might be packin H.I.V.
Me, I'm packin jimmy hats
So a hoe won't give me that
Shit about she on the pill
Knowin that her pussy kill
See, through my education illustrations were the key
See, where I'm from only bustas have to pay a fee
Now you might ask what can a nigga do to get started
Pull a hoe and go enroll in Break-A-Bitch College

Ah yeah
Now that was a very nice lecture
And as I walk back over to the middle of the bulletin board
I - I kinda figured, I wondered to myself
And I looked at my class, and I
It seems that you have more questions
Is there any more questions?

Yes
Yes, Mister MJG
I have a question
Yes?
Ah - in 94
Do you think - ah
Any bitches are gonna come up?
Can - can any bitches be pimps?

Look here, look here
Let me tell you...

[MJG:]
Now these bitches got a lotta game for a nigga, so
That made me try to see how to break a hoe
What exactly would it take for me to make the bitch click
How damn quick could I make the bitch break a trick
How fuckin long will it take to make my profit
And what kinda justice can this hoe do for my pocket
Talkin space-age pimpin, similar to the oldies
In ways like keepin our business tight, not by tryina be Goldie
These niggas gettin they game picked down to the bone
If you listen on what these hoes have to say, your money's gone
Nigga, focus on your own rhyme, make em follow your own rules
Don't be a fool, nigga, bring that bitch on by to school
I got a class for that ass, and it stars at seven
'I was a pimp' at ten o'clock, break till eleven
Future looks good for the smartest
Niggas in the school of Sir Break-A-Bitch College

Okay class, okay class
Everybody just needs to settle down
Everybody just settle down
We're gonna break in about 15 minutes
But we have one more lecture, one more lecture
Now ehm, eh
Calm down, calm down
I'm gonna take one more question
I'm gonna take -
Are there any more questions?

Ah yeah - ah
I wanna know
How can a ordinary busta like me
You know, you know
...get in Break-A-Bitch College?

[Eightball:]
Not long ago I grew up as a youngster in this shit
When all I wanted to do is stick my dick up in a bitch
That dope made my ends, and my ends bought me weed
And all I wanted to see was them young bitches on they knees
Uncle Sam, damn, can I get a job, see
I don't wanna sell this dope, and nope, I don't wanna get out and rob
Today I was coolin like I usually do
I met this hoe after a show that wanted to chew me and screw
Now some busta-ass nigga woulda fucked the bitch
But at Break-A-Bitch College that's called trickin off your dick
On the corner ain't no pimps, real players are low-key
I'm on the verge of a splurge, settin up shop in Tennessee
Ain't no future for the lame, ain't no love in this game
Do you fuck them hoes and trust them hoes and love em with no shame?
9 times out of 10, trick nigga, if you do
Break-A-Bitch College got a scholarship just for you

Ah yes
Damn good class, damn good class
Wonderful graduates
I love em all, I love em all

Now class
Can you all join in with me
For our school alma mater
And let's sing it
I'm proud to be an alumni
From Break-A-College
I'm proud to be...