Talking Turkey

G
You get the hotel,
Em7
I'll get the box of wine.
G
No sadder words had been spoken,
Em7
Since the dawn of time.
     D        C
When we were young,
          Am7                Em7
We never think that it will come to 
this,
             C            Am7
Because you only get one shot;
           Em7
I took my shot and missed.
G
She said "You just keep it still 
love,
Em7
I'll get the cameras going".
G
I'm still amazed at the things I do,
Em7
To keep my debts from growing.
      D       C                 
She says "We've got some sort of
Am7         Em7
 symbiotic relationship",
              C
And for our purposes,
     Am7              Em7
She says she finds me well equipped.
G                     Em7
(She's barkin' up my tree),
       D             C
(And bouncin' on my knee).

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Like some sort of Buddha-baby!

G               Em7
(She's a talkin' turkey),
   D          C
(Smokin' my jerky).
Am7
I guess I'm in the market for what 
she's hawkin',
D                                 
Build some more shelves cause 
   C
we're gonna keep stockin',
 Am7                          Em7 
We can talk turkey till the turkey
                       G
 starts talkin' to me!
F               Am7           G
Her stomach's bigger than my eyes!

(Happy Thanksgiving, baby!)

F            Am7
She smothers me inside;
C             D             
This time I daren't forget the 
     Em7
gravy.

Em7

G
She says "I'll just freshen up now,
Em7
I'm expecting some more friends".
    G
And it's becoming clear to me,
             Em7
There's more filth around the bend.
D             C                
She said I'm too functioning 
Am7             Em7
for her kind of internet,
         C             Am7        
And she always gets everything 
            Em7
that she sets out to get.
G        Em7
(She's teaching birds and bees),
D                  C
(And always pushin' me).

Like a leather monstrosity!

G
(She's a talkin' turkey),
Em7
(Smoking the jerky).
C                             Am7
Better get the door 'cause I hear 
your friends knocking,
D                        C
Turn around sister and just keep 
walking.
Am7                         Em7  
We can talk turkey till the 
                 G
turkey is talking to me!

Talking to me!

F             Am7
She's shaking her thighs!
G
(You know how to treat a lady),
F            Am7
She smothers me and dies!
C              D        Em7
Happy Thanksgiving, baby,