Half-Cocked

Ethel Cain

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    Sunday morning and I'm wasted
    Had too much to drink again
    Preacher's saying God will save me
    If God is real, He's a fucking bitch

    Tell my baby that I love her
    But, right now, mama's gotta go
    I didn't ask to be this crazy
    But since we're here, I'll give them a show

    Always run from the best of them
    But I'll fall for a piece of shit
    Half-cocked 'cause he's not a big boy
    And I don't wanna know that half of him

    If you try to hurt me, I won't stop you
    But there's something you should know
    It's that my daddy's fucking crazy
    And always ready to blow

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    The first boy I ever loved
    Was a brother I never had
    I thought, with him, maybe I'd make it
    Maybe it'd be half as bad

    Spent my nights under the covers
    Just wishing he was there
    Draw his portrait in my diary
    Just to hold when I got scared

    Now I'm fucked up and I'm nasty
    But they say I make it look good
    I don't do what my mama told me
    I just do what my mama would

    I don't starve 'cause I hate my body
    I just starve 'cause I'm fucking broke
    And on my mama, I hate this country
    America is a fucking joke

    What's gonna scare me when I've seen it all?
    Oh, been too sick to walk, so I had to crawl
    When you leave, turn off the light
    I leave my door open at night

    To be strung out and still be stone cold
    To reach the end, but never close to old
    I don't feel good, but I don't wanna cry
    If I can't live, can I just fucking die?

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