The Real Escape

I took a look at myself
I dropped all my defenses
After fooling myself
For so long

I broke all my habits
I gave up my pretences
I faced all those things
So crazy and wrong

I had reached a point
Where I could fall no deeper
Right there I knew what to do
Eventually

I know you thought
I was just running away
But the real escape
I had made years ago
Deep inside of me

Are there just no Forevers in life
Are they all just illusion
Just something we build to protect us
From feeling so lost and lonely

Would it be wiser to be
Happy when things are just good
Instead of yearning for perfection
That we'll never find most likely

That advice I have given
To friends and that so much more
Applied to myself
Came back to my mind

How desperately I must have
Tried to believe
That in my own little world
Things were perfectly right

I lied to myself
I despised myself
I denied myself
But the pain grew stronger

I will lie to myself
I will despise myself
I will deny myself
Not one day longer

Because there is no such thing at all
At least not for you and me