Fixed And Dilated

[a) fixed and dilated]

I can taste my own venom
In the back of my throat
I've kept it hidden
As long as i could

The angry child inside me
Baptized in gentility
Was raised on cruelty
In a violent world

The urge to kill still tickles
Like a maggot that wiggles
In the skin of a kitten
And these words that i've written
Won't deaden the nerve

You don't look blind
And yet you wonder why
We are this way
It's as plain as the blood in our veins

I have always turned the other cheek
As though the face i'd strike,
Would be my own

And all the fists that i've denied
Conspire against my gentle side
When mercy leaves i am diseased
A plague of rage come over me

Are we here to pray for each other?
Or are we here to prey on each other?

On each other?
For each other?

[b) bloody and unfocused]

All my anger
And hatred
Once turned inward
Now spun outward

A tornado of shattered glass
Bloody and unfocused

If you think
For one minute
You can overlook me,
You are wrong

Through music,
Through art
Or through violence
I will not be ignored

I would rather empty a clip
Into your brain
And then mine
Than walk away from this
Without satisfaction

Did you hear me?
I would rather kill you
Than walk away from this
Without satisfaction