Not This

I'm still takin the train and
My metro card's empty
The windows of the stores when I walk by tempt me
I was on MTV but I don't have a Bently
F*** it in my pockets I barely gotta twenty
Dollar bill but I go to shows
And make you holla still
I gotta pay my bills and it's not like Prada will
I go to the check cashing spot
Will I always be a have not
Never gonna live in no lavish spot
Always gonna live at home with mom and pop
Shop at Old Navy and Payless
I'm just tryna be honest that why I say this
Hopefully radio plays this I doubt it though
Yo pass that Olde English

Yeah I be rockin the discotech
Every single night no self respect
Sometimes I feel like I party way too much
Premieres openings and shows and such but
What else is a girl to do
Go home by myself at 2
In the AM I'm sayin I'm not playin
I'm doin the same stupid shit and it's day in day out
I know that there's gotta be a way out
But I keep drinking and I just stay out
At the hot spots with superstars and the hardrocks
I wish that I could disappear to the boondocks
Why not, maybe I'll hire me a pilot
To take me away to the shade and I'll stay
Get a slice at Ray's like we did when we was kids
Something's gotta give real soon but it's not this

On the real I be hatin myself sometimes
I know you do too but it's okay sometimes
I'm tryin to escape the grind sometimes
It ain't gonna get better if I do some lines so
Enough with the parties and bullshit
I go to the parties and bullshit
It never gets better when I do this shit
So stressed I wanna get up and quit
It's like maybe tonight's the night and
Maybe if I socialize I'll feel alright but those
Never seem to be the best laid plans
Never did I dream I'd go to foreign lands I just
Wanna lay in creamy sands
Doing nothin all day with my dreamy man maybe
Buy that house across from the projects
So I can stay trading gossip like stock tips

It's not at the after party
It's not in the hotel lobby
It's not in magazines
And It's not even in my dreams
The things that I need
Ain't in the vip
Dont know what it is
It's definitely not this