Thinking (Driking)

I hate who I am when I'm thinking
And I hate who I am when I'm drinking
When I'm drinking it stops me from thinking
Thinking that I have been sinking
Lower and lower and lower
Feeling like my life is over
Feeling like I'm going nowhere
Just feeling and feeling and feeling and feeling
And feeling like I shouldn't be drinking

I had to stop thinking
What was I thinking

I hate who I am when I'm clinging
To the times I was actually getting
Joy from these words I've been winging
Joy from the warmth a new day brings
Joy from all of the small things
Joy just from anything
Or anything other than
Needing and needing and needing and needing
And needing to be drinking

I gotta stop thinking
I gotta stop thinking
Gotta start drinking

But just take some magnesium, a tasty gummy vitamin
Go outside in the Sun
Take a walk or go for a-
No, just take some vitamin d and drink some water for me
Can't you see
Oh, can't you see
It's the only cure you need

One day at a time
Makes it seem fine
It's just another day
It's just another one to throw away
But when I add up the time I know it isn't fine
I've thrown away and I'll keep throwing away every day
As long as I keep living this way

But I like who I am when I'm helpful
And I like who I am when I have self-control
But the times these things happen is pitiful
Leaning to a life that feels regrettable
Or on the best days forgettable
Feeling I'm leaning towards wasting
Wasting your time with my whining
Wasting my time, always wasting my time
Always wasting my time, always drinking

I gotta stop drinking
I have to stop drinking
I have to start thinking

One day at a time
Makes it seem fine
It's just another day
It's just another one to throw away
But when I add up the time I know it isn't fine
I've thrown away and I'll keep throwing away every day
As long as I keep living this way