Andy, The Handy Man

Now I'm a jack-of-all-trades, as busy as a bee
Should anything need fixing, just get in touch with me
If your water cisterns frozen, or the babys face turns blue
Ring me on the telephone, cos I know what to do
They call me Andy, George Andy, Andy the handy man

My job is dandy, dandy, I do the best I can
I'm always at your service, you may depend
And don't forget it's never too late to mend
As an artist I draw faces, my profiles are divine
But when it comes to figures, thats where I'm not so fine
A girl told me last night, I didn't know where to "draw the line"
Oh, it comes in handy being a handy man
Now in the park one morning, a bulldog I did see
I fairly stood and shivered when it came and sniffed at me
I didn't even move when it mistook me for a tree
Oh, it comes in handy being a handy man

They call me Andy, George Andy, Andy the handy man
My job is dandy, dandy, I do the best I can
I'm always at your service, you may depend
And dont forget its never too late to mend
A baby once was christened, the parson said "well, well"
He isn't like his mother or his father you can tell
Who does the child remind you of? And the choir began to yell
"Oh, it comes in handy being a handy man"

A girl gave me a gold watch, I said "it's rather light
It's got no works inside it, now surely thats not right"
She said "now dont you worry, I'll give you the works tonight"
Oh, it comes in handy being a handy man

Additional couplet
I went to mend a bath once, imagine my surprise
When the outline of a female inside the bath I spies
I thought I'd better make quite sure, but the soap got in my eyes
Oh, it comes in handy being a handy man