E  
How do you do, I
E    G
See you've met my
G    A              A  E
faithful handyman.

E    
He's just a little brought down, Be-
E    G
cause when you knocked
G    A                      A   E
he thought you were the candyman.

E    
Don't get strung out
E    G
by the way I look,
G    A                      A   E
don't judge a book by its cover.
E    
I'm not much of a girl
E    G
by the light of day,
G    A                           A   E
but by night I'm one hell of a lover.

           B7                      A                      E
I'm just a sweet transvestite from Sensational, Transylvania.

E    
Let me show you around, maybe
E    G
play you a sound,
G    A                             A   E
you look like you're both pretty groovy.

E   
Or if you want something visual
E    G
that's not too abysmal,
G    A                         A   E
we could take in an old Steve Reeves movie.

E   
Well, you got caught with a flat, well,
E    G
how 'bout that?
G    A                   A   E
Well, babies, don't you panic.

E    
By the light of the night,
E    G
when it all seems alright,
G    A
I'll get you a satanic mechanic.

           B7                      A                   E
I'm just a sweet transvestite from Sensational, Transylvania.

E   
Why don't you stay for the night?  Night.
E    G
Or maybe a bite?  Bite.
G    A                                          A   E
I could show you my favorite obsession.

E    
I've been making a man
E    G
with blond hair and a tan,
G    A                   A   E
and he's good for relieving my tension.

           B7                      A                  E
I'm just a sweet transvestite from Sensational, Transylvania.
           B7                      A                  E
I'm just a sweet transvestite from Sensational, Transylvania.

E
So - come up to the lab,
G
and see what's on the slab,
E
I see you shiver with antici...pation.
G
But maybe the rain
E
isn't really to blame,
A
so I'll remove the cause
E
HA HA HA, but not the symptom.