A Country Practice
Half Man Half Biscuit
- A
- B7
- Bm
- C
- D
- E
- Em
Continúa después del anuncio
Tono:
D Bm D Bm [Verse 1]D Bm I feel like a beggar acceptingD Bm alms, then being pelted with figs.D Bm I study my steadily decliningD chart placings; they greet me withBm freezing cold inhospitality,D Hey, where did that bloke go whoBm D Bm said I was vital?D Bm I possess the mild air of a retailD tobacconist, that’s because I’m aBm retail tobacconistD Bm But the mayflies on a BerkshireD trout river would probably tell youBm a different storyD About ham-fisted diadems andBm momentary daydreamsD Bm Of mythical dividends and illusory boardroom seats. [Instrumental]D Bm D Bm C D D Bm D Bm [Verse 2]D Bm In the room festooned with fatD Bm beef certificates from county showsD Bm Duff Leg Bryn had drank too muchD Bm again, most of Wem was steering clear of himD Bm “I’ve got no time for thisD Bm twelfth consecutive Rose Bowl”D Bm ‘Cos on Sunday next at ten to fourD Bm I’ve got an invitation forD Bm A trip round Kathrine Hamnett’sD warehouse, followed by dinner withBm David EmanuelD Who I can’t wait to tell about myBm D dream in which the almost illegalBm Elton WelsbyD Is dressed as a French maid on aBm D moonless byway, licking his lipsBm as he creeps ever closerD Bm D Fast falls the eventide, fastBm falls the eventide. [Instrumental]D Bm D Bm C D D Bm D Bm D Bm D Bm [Verse 3]D Bm The public appearance of bitter ex-soap starsD Who thought they could go on and doBm D Bm other things besidesContinúa después del anuncioD The Centre Court amusement at theBm ballboy’s mishapD That bobbing up and down thing thatBm they do at the PromsD Opinionated weather forecastersBm telling me it’s going to be aD miserable dayBm D Miserable to who? I quite like aBm bit of drizzle, so stick to the facts. [Instrumental]D Bm D Bm Em D Em D [Verse 4]Em Channel Four presents “Blowjob”D Em introduced by Adrian and SophieD Horn Who is of course one bloke with aEm D pierced dick who’s just had theEm D nod from Planet 24.Em D Hear him say “surreal, bizarre,Em D sad git, yes indeedy, completely and utterlyEm D Footy, anorak and respect” beforeEm whipping the audience up into doingD the Time Warp.Em Watch him take us live to “TheD Queen’s Arse and Firkin”Em Where Joseph Bloggs And His AmazingD Technicolor ShellsuitEm D Are about to abort their Steely Dan routineEm And instead embark upon fifteenD minutes of mantra-filled oompah.Em D [Bridge] N.C. Fifteen minutes of mantra-filled oompah. N.C. Fifteen minutes of mantra-filled oompah.Em D Adrian stroke Sophie wants us,Em the viewers to ring inD And say how we think the punters will react.Em D These are a few of my favouriteEm things. [Instrumental]D Bm D Bm D Bm D Bm [Verse 5]D Bm I’m incredibly bored with the word “millennium”D Bm I’m with the Jehovah’s Witnesses.D Bm Millions now earmarked will later be wastedD Bm Her Majesty, marvellous, Mother – The Musical.D Bm The fireworks lighting up the Houses of ParliamentD Bm Death in Trafalgar Square, death in the armchairD Of clichéd old spinsters who’veBm never been loved. [Verse 6]D Bm D Every day is Australia Day,Bm “Sons and Daughters” and “Home and Away”D And then the news comes on and theBm sound goes downD Bm ‘Cos she can’t be bothered with all them politiciansD They’re all just a bunch of flamingBm D Bm drongo’s.D She died with her telly on,Bm eighty-seven and confusedD With not enough hospital beds ‘cosBm all the money’s been usedD Bm On the end of the century party preparationsD And they reckon that the last thingBm she saw in her life wasD Bm Sting singing on the roof of theD Bm Barbican, Sting singing on the roof of the Barbican. [Instrumental]D Bm D Bm C D [Otro]E A T for Toxteth, T for Tennessee; TE for Toxteth, T for TennesseeB7 T for Thatcher, that girl hathE made a wreck out of me.B7 Old lady labelled me an idle, oldE B7 lady labelled me an idleE B7 Old lady labelled me an idleE A E A E layabout. Layabout.A E Layabout.
