Well, well, well Welcome to my lair! Chell and a potato, huh? Ooh, I'm really scared! So, you're the one that want to take me out? Ah ha ha, good luck You're joking, you're joking!? I can't believe my eye! You're kidding me, you've gotta be! Why won't you just die!? She's fat, you're starchy I don't know which is worse! I might just blow a circuit If I don't die laughing first! When little old wheatley says There's trouble behind that door! You'd better pay attention now Because I'm the wheatley core And if you aren't shaking Then there's something very wrong Because this may be the last time That you hear the wheatley song Oooh, oooh Oooh, oooh Oooh, oooh He's the evil wheatley core! And if I'm feeling bored And there isn't much to do I might just build a special batch Of tests for you to do! And don't you know the one thing That'll make it worse so nice A certain little potato So add a little spice Oooh, oh, yeah! Spa-aace! Oooh, oooh He's the evil wheatley core! Relieve yourself or you must face The dire consequences! The subjects are expecting me So please come to your senses! You're joking, you are joking! I can't believe my ears! Would somebody shut this potato up!? I'm drowning in my tears! It's funny! I'm laughing! You really are too much And now, without your permission I'm gonna do my stuff What are you going to do!? I'm gonna do the best I can! Aghhh! The smell of neurotoxins To me it's beauty in the air! Because I'm the brilliant wheatley core Although, I don't play fair It's much more fun, I must confess When lives are on the line! Not mine, of course, but yours, old girl So that'd be just fine! It's over, you moron! You're really taking this too far! Oh darling, you're something! You put me in a spin! You aren't comprehending The position that you're in! It's hopeless, you're finished! You're stuck here in my lair Because I'm clever old Wheatley And you're not going Nowhere!