Nothingness

I wish I could be more
But my lack of will sank me into nothing

I'm drowning into a void I created
And I insist to dive deep
But I still force myself to feel
Anything that expels the anxiety

But I know I can't reach the surface
I just can't embrace anything
Seems like every effort is worthless
And life is a game I know I'll never win

Despair is already a part of me
And I still don't know how to push aside all the anxiety
I've lost all faith in myself
I cannot escape this nothingness
I'll keep on drowning 'till I disappear

I've lost all faith in myself
I'm diving in