Changes

Changes
Lately I've been feeling some changes
Thoughts you could call them so dangerous
They seem to come and go but
They're mostly to stay here

Words like you'll never be good enough
You'll never get it done
Yeah look at you giving up
No one's ever cared of anything you're putting out
You give your all and you're getting back minimum

Yeah I know yeah I know
All the times that I'm low
I sit back in this corner and I'm writing a song
I've got no one to call never had that really
I felt like a burden

Didn't reach out to any
Minds Heavy so my head's down daily
Living through mistakes yeah I've made some maybe
Admitting some things that I've lived through
That might be an issue

Cutting through my skin's like ripping through tissue
Changes, lately I've been feeling some changes
Things I want to give but I can't 'cause I'm nameless
People that I love, want to help them, it pains me
I can't 'cause I'm not quite there with this music

It pays less than working every hour
Every day till I'm faded
What a big price to be paid yeah
Giving up on normal behaviour
Yeah, I remember sitting in my room for a decade

Didn't move for second, when I left I thought it would stay behind, but it didn't
Now it follows me still every day is a reminder, what I hated about me
Why I stayed out of your way
What it meant to be lonely
And this feeling of wanting some relief

And then knowing that this peace
Wasn't something in my reach
'Cause this feeling of pressure
As time passing is making it hard to breath
Are you feeling some changes
Lately I've been seeing some changes

Everything I feared that
I was got to face it
Who I used to be and who
I am is it the same thing?
Always had some questions
Never had conversations

Always had my faith but never wanted to say it
Always ran away in a time I needed to stay there
Maybe all I needed was knowing that I could change things
Hardest part is waking up thinking I'll never make it
Welcome to my mind it's full of darkened places
You know it real when I'm putting my feelings on display

Cause love is hard for me
I'm still learning how to embrace it
If this is where I'm supposed to be
Why do I feel out of place then
If this is what I'm supposed to feel
Why do I feel like I'm fading

I get that I could never be the perfect me
Trying to run my sadness out the door
Showed me some things I needed
This is who I am and if I try to fight it I'm defeated
Struggling with fears you don't know this

But I fight a feeling
What if change is the reason that I would never make it
What if happiness means the music will go away then
Will I go back to the person who I can't escape from
I may be overthinking it but I'm allowed to say this
The Tim you know and love is not the one I live with daily

How can I be there for them when I felt lost for ages
And how do I hand you the world
When both my arms are breaking
Yeah, I've been carrying my issues
Way too long I'm aching

Can I just let them go for second
I'm tired of waiting
You tell me this is the start of my life
To just be patient
And everything that led to now

Will teach me things you prayed for
Yeah every song I write I'm
Hoping will lead to some changes
It will lead to some changes
Is it leading to changes

Yeah I feel like I'm changing
We're beginning to change things
It will lead to some changes
Is it leading to changes
I've been looking for changes
Now I feel like I'm changing